Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfieldwas an American stand-up comedian, actor, producer and writer, known for the catchphrase "I don't get no respect!" and his monologues on that theme. He is also remembered for his 1980s film roles, especially in Easy Money, Caddyshack, and Back to School...
ProfessionMovie Actor
Date of Birth22 November 1921
CityDeer Park, NY
respect army dark
It was the same thing in the army, no respect. They gave me a uniform that glowed in the dark.
morning laughing guy
This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me.
hair gray gray-hair
It's great to have gray hair. Ask anyone who's bald.
funny relationship marriage
We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.
wife bars naked
...went to a bar for a few drinks. The bartender asked what I wanted. "Surprise me", I said. So he showed me a naked picture of my wife.
funny cheating humor
I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.
marriage thinking wife
Last time I tried to make love to my wife nothing happened, so I said to her, 'What's the matter, you can't think of anybody either?'
funny humor suicidal
I remember I was so depressed I was going to jump out a window on the tenth floor; they sent a priest up to talk to me and he said, ' On your mark...'
cousin gay london
My cousins gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock.
problem appeals can-do
My problem is that I appeal to everyone that can do me absolutely no good.
sex wife car
My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.
wife machines alive
I shouldn't tell jokes about my wife. she's attached to a machine that keeps her alive... The refrigerator.
beach believe men
You don't know who to believe. Like Abraham Lincoln. He said all men were created equal. He never went to a nude beach.
wife bed opinion
Never tell your wife she's bad in bed. She'll go out and get a second opinion.