Rodney Dangerfield

Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfieldwas an American stand-up comedian, actor, producer and writer, known for the catchphrase "I don't get no respect!" and his monologues on that theme. He is also remembered for his 1980s film roles, especially in Easy Money, Caddyshack, and Back to School...
ProfessionMovie Actor
Date of Birth22 November 1921
CityDeer Park, NY
mean kids eye
My boy is a mean kid. I came home the other day and saw him taping worms to the sidewalk, he sits there and watches the birds get hernias. Well, only last Christmas I gave him a B-B gun and he gave me a sweatshirt with a bulls-eye on the back. I told my kids, "Someday, you'll have kids of your own." One of them said, "So will you."
funny humor eye
My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it.
beauty beautiful eye
If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is ugliness.
funny humor eye
For Christmas one year I bought my son a BB gun. He bought me a t-shirt with a bulls eye on the back.
born morning mother sickness ugly
I'm so ugly - My mother had morning sickness - After I was born
came carries father fathers kid picture ugly wallet
I'm so ugly - My father carries around a picture of the kid who came with his wallet
asking kept people pet ugly worked
I'm so ugly - I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get
girl nobody
girl phoned me the other day and said .... Come on over, there's nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home.
cat children covering kept kid played ugly
I was such an ugly kid - When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up
boy funny growing poor
I was so poor growing up - if I wasn't a boy - I'd have had nothing to play with
birth boy control poster year
One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control
born doctor face funny took turned
When I was born the doctor took one look at my face .... turned me over and said. Look ... twins!
american-comedian happy twenty wife
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met!
funny mind second ugly
My psychiatrist told me I'm going crazy. I told him .... If you don't mind I'd like a second opinion. He said .... Alright.... you're ugly too!