Famous Quotes & Sayings

Arthur Conan Doyle

I consider that a man's brain originally is like a little empty attic, and you have to stock it with such furniture as you choose.

Arthur Conan Doyle

A dog reflects the family life. Whoever saw a frisky dog in a gloomy family, or a sad dog in a happy one? Snarling people have snarling dogs, dangerous people have dangerous ones.

Anthony Sampson

Members rise from CMG (known sometimes in Whitehall as 'Call Me God') to KCMG ('Kindly Call Me God') to .. the GCMG ('God Calls Me God').

Barbara Kingsolver

He had senile dementia and liked to go outside naked, but he could still do two things perfectly: win at checkers and write out prescriptions.

Barbara Kingsolver

Wars and elections are both too big and too small to matter in the long run. The daily work - that goes on, it adds up.

Margaret Geller

There are things done under the name of science which are ridiculous. But there is also stuff done which sounds funny but is really serious.

Barbara Mertz

No woman really wants a man to carry her off; she only wants him to want to do it.

Augusten Burroughs

The Schnauzer listens to jazz. I listen to jazz because he likes it, and I have even gone to jazz concerts with him, but truthfully I would rather listen to retarded children pounding on pan lids with wooden spoons.

Arthur Miller

The only thing you got in this world is what you can sell. And the funny thing is that you're a salesman, and you don't know that.

Arthur Adamov

The reason why Absurdist plays take place in No Man's Land with only two characters is primarily financial.

Art Linkletter

Each generation has been an education for us in different ways. The first child-with-bloody-nose was rushed to the emergency room. The fifth child-with-bloody-nose was told to go to the yard immediately and stop bleeding on the carpet.

Carlos Santana

Your wrinkles either show that you're nasty, cranky, and senile, or that you're always smiling.

Caleb Followill

You can't make someone love you, all you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in

C. P. Scott

Television: The word is half Greek, half Latin. No good can come of it.

Cathy Guisewite

Defy your own group. Rebel against yourself.

Cathy Guisewite

I'm more financially successful, but it just means the shopping blunders I make are bigger now.

Cathy Guisewite

Every time I get something under control in my own life, the world provides more material.

Catherine Zeta-Jones

I think egg boiling is the hardest thing I've ever done, but I can make a tiramisu anytime you want.

Casey Stengel

There comes a time in every man's life, and I've had plenty of them.

Casey Stengel

They say Yogi Berra is funny. Well, he has a lovely wife and family, a beautiful home, money in the bank, and he plays golf with millionaires. What's funny about that?

Casey Stengel

Oldtimers, weekends, and airplane landings are alike. If you can walk away from them, they're successful.

Casey Stengel

All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.

Carl Hiaasen

I've always enjoyed making people laugh. But in order for me to be funny, I have to get ticked off about something.

Carl Jung

The woman is increasingly aware that love alone can give her full stature, just as the man begins to discern that spirit alone can endow his life with its highest meaning. Fundamentally, therefore, both seek a psychic relation to the other, because love needs the spirit, and the spirit love, for their fulfillment.

Carl Jung

Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.

Calvin Trillin

The margin of error in astrology is plus or minus one hundred percent.

Calvin Trillin

The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.

We're still pretty funny but we realized that when things are too funny out front, people don't get through to the serious core, ... We wanted to show the other side.

Aldo Leopold

The first law of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts

Aldous Huxley

Happiness is like coke — something you get as a by-product in the process of making something else.

Aldous Huxley

What we feel and think and are is to a great extent determined by the state of our ductless glands and viscera.

Aldous Huxley

Maybe this world is another planet's Hell.

Aldous Huxley

You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you mad.