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funny-inspirational giving done
When someone says, "I want a programming language in which I need only say what I want done," give him a lollipop. Alan Perlis
funny-inspirational minutes ready
I can get ready in 10 minutes. Carolina Herrera
funny-inspirational soul mind
Keep the other person's well being in mind when you feel an attack of soul-purging truth coming on. Betty White
funny-inspirational jobs new-york
Lotto fever hit New York again this week, and like the old saying goes, 'You gotta be in it to win it'... but first, you gotta have a dead end job so pathetic you're willing to kill five hours standing in line for a 1 in 25 million chance. Dennis Miller
funny-inspirational honest-woman honest
Funny women are honest women. Elizabeth Meriwether
funny-inspirational trying red
Not since I was 10, trying to get Nick Vossler's attention in PE. 'Red Rover, Red Rover, send Nicholas right over!' Elizabeth Olsen
funny-inspirational integrity technology
Most software today is very much like an Egyptian pyramid with millions of bricks piled on top of each other, with no structural integrity, but just done by brute force and thousands of slaves. Alan Kay
funny-inspirational spring fools-day
Here cometh April again, and as far as I can see the world hath more fools in it than ever. Charles Lamb
funny-inspirational generosity investment
Generosity is the best investment. Diane von Furstenberg
funny-valentines-day mistake people
Most people are slow to champion love because they fear the transformation it brings into their lives. And make no mistake about it: love does take over and transform the schemes and operations of our egos in a very mighty way. Aberjhani
funny-valentines-day wish body
I wish Adam had died with all his ribs in his body. Dion Boucicault
funny-valentines-day together beets
Valentine's Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th. David Letterman
funny-valentines-day mean news
Happy Valentine's Day! And if this is news to you, my guess is you're probably alone. Valentine's Day is often times a, well, it's a manufactured day that really doesn't mean anything. Jon Stewart
funny-valentines-day love-you wife
The jewelry stores say, 'Tell your wife you love her with a diamond,' while wives tell you they love you with, 'Ok, but just because it's Valentine's Day.' George Lopez
funny-valentines-day ideas giving
Oh here's an idea: let's make pictures of our internal organs and give them to other people we love on Valentine's Day. That's not weird at all. Jimmy Fallon
funny-valentines-day holiday special
Valentine's Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone, you're alone. Lewis Black
funny-valentines-day love-you eden
Love doesn't grow on trees like apples in Eden - it's something you have to make. And you must use your imagination too.... Joyce Cary
funny-valentines-day cat smell
Basement smells bad. Look for cat poops, change litter. Martha Stewart
wish gates
The wishing gate opens into nothing. Charles Spurgeon
wish half wells
The literati in their cellarsPerform semantic tarantellas.I wish I did it half as well as them. Al Stewart
wish weakness euthanasia
My weaknesses... I wish I could come up with something. I'd probably have the same pause if you asked me what my strengths are. Maybe they're the same thing. Al Pacino
wish world back-again
Wish I could spin my world into reverse just to have you back again David Guetta
wish three drink
I wish I could learn that just three drinks is enough, but I have not learned that. Caitlin Moran
wish narnia wardrobe
Daryl shrugged. "If wishes were wardrobes, we'd be in Narnia. Bryan Davis
wish expected wish-you-the-best
I wish you the best that can be hoped for, and no worse than can be expected. Catherynne M. Valente
wish criminal-mind criminals
Nothing is so common as the wish to be remarkable.(attributed to) William Shakespeare
wish purpose failing
If wishes would prevail with me, my purpose should not fail with me.