Famous Quotes & Sayings

Dave Barry

My wife, like many women, actually LIKES wrapping things. If she gives you a gift that requires batteries, she wraps the batteries separately, which to me is very close to being a symptom of mental illness.

Bryan White

Christmas makes me happy no matter what time of year it comes around.

Arlo Guthrie

What's in that pipe that he's smoking?

Andy Borowitz

Christmas never would have caught on if it had been called Celebrate a Little Jew's Birthday.

Andy Borowitz

Christmas sweaters are only acceptable as a cry for help.

Conan O'Brien

There are 17 more shopping days until Christmas. So, guys, that means 16 more days till we start shopping, right?

Jimmy Roy

We have a small, tight family. I left home at a young age and the best thing for me was to go home at Christmas-time and spend time with my family and friends. It's kind of funny, most people do turkey and all the trimmings, but we would have a big seafood festival because it's the only time of the year that we'd eat it. We never really went caroling, but once in a while we'd got out for a sleigh ride

Louis C. K.

One thing I learned from drinking is that if you ever go Christmas caroling, you should go with a group of people. And also go in mid-December.

John Leo

The principal advantage of the non-parental lifestyle is that on Christmas Eve you need not be struck dumb by the three most terrifying words that the government allows to be printed on any product: "Some assembly required."

Cheryl Strayed

Hiking the PCT was the maddening effort of knitting that sweater and unraveling it over and over again. As if everything gained was inevitably lost

Cheryl Strayed

Going down (descending), I realized, was like taking hold of the loose strand of yard on a sweater you'd just spent hours knitting and pulling it until the entire sweater unraveled into a pile of string. Hiking the PCT was the maddening effort of knitting that sweater and unraveling it over and over again. As if everything gained was inevitably lost.

Charlotte Gainsbourg

Style for me is a casual way of putting something on. It's not thought out but needs to suit your way of life. Now I like wearing the same sweater over and over again, then taking it off when it's smelly.

Barbara Kingsolver

I have my own sheep and I literally sheer the sheep and knot sweaters for friends and family from scratch.

Barbara Kingsolver

I've about decided that's the main thing that separates happy people from the other people: the feeling that you're a practical item, with a use, like a sweater or a socket wrench.

Andy Borowitz

It only cost Mitt Romney $76.6 million to defeat a serial adulterer and a mental patient in a sweater vest.

Dylan Lauren

If these rich women from 5th Avenue spend a fortune on cashmere sweaters, they will come to my store to buy gummy bears.

Chuck Klosterman

and I spilled gravy on my Carolina sweater, because I am alive,

Alice Hoffman

That was the way illness appeared in a house, in the corners, in between floorboards, on the hooks in the closet, along with the sweaters and coats.

Charles Stanley

Helping someone come to a saving knowledge of Christ is the greatest achievement possible.

Alan Clark

The more you know about a species, the more you understand about how better to help protect them.

Chogyam Trungpa

Helping others is a question of being genuine and projecting that genuineness to others. This way of being doesn't have to have a title or a name particularly. It is just being ultimately decent.

David Shuster

Prosecutors tend to love conspiracy charges because the rules of evidence are easier, meaning you can get more in to help prove a crime.

David Schwimmer

I love helping someone else tell their story, but I like being the storyteller sometimes.

David Koechner

All of those measures of relationships that you have in your life help feed your and inform your ability to act.

Dave Barry

Seriously? You won’t help me?” “Help yourself get killed? No, I won’t.

Mark Cuban

Selling is never about convincing. It is always about helping.

Charles William Eliot

The most satisfactory thing in all this earthly life is to be able to serve our fellow-beings-first, those who are bound to us by ties of love, then the wider circle of fellow-townsmen, fellow-countrymen, or fellow-men. To be of service is a solid foundation for contentment in this world.