Woody Allen
Woody Allen
Heywood "Woody" Allenis an American actor, comedian, filmmaker, playwright and musician, whose career spans more than six decades...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionDirector
Date of Birth1 December 1935
CityBronx, NY
CountryUnited States of America
thinking car house
There are drawbacks in being famous too, but you can live with those. They're not life-threatening. If the paparazzi are outside your restaurant or your house - and actors make such a big thing of it and scurry into cars and drape things - you think they're going to be crucified or something. It's not a big deal. You can get used to that. It's not so terrible.
funny life mushrooms
Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad.
toilets paper problem
Problems are like toilet paper. You pull on one and ten more come.
god religious humorous
If God is everywhere, I had concluded, then He is in food. Therefore, the more I ate the godlier I would become. Impelled by this new religious fervor, I glutted myself like a fanatic.
people suffering despair
Life is a tragedy filled with suffering and despair and yet some people do manage to avoid jury duty.
uncles fun play
As I've gotten older, the parts have diminished. I liked it when I was younger, I could always play the lead in the movie and I could do all the romantic scenes with the women, and it was fun and I liked to play that. Now, I'm older and I'm reduced to playing the backstage doorman or the uncle or something. I don't really love that so occasionally, when a part comes up, I'll play it.
people world wonderful
What a world. It could be so wonderful if it wasn't for certain people.
remains
My relationship with death remains the same - I'm strongly against it.
funeral grandfather tables
My grandfather had a wonderful funeral... On the buffet table there was a replica of the deceased in potato salad.
productive-life done prey
I've had a very productive life. I've worked very hard, I've never fallen prey to depression. I'm not sure I could have done all of that without being in psychoanalysis.
funny-love funny-sex sex-and-love
The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.
violent haphazard universe
[The universe is] haphazard, morally neutral, and unimaginably violent.
funny humor night
My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker.
negative degenerates
Change is almost always negative. Things degenerate.