Quotes about humor
humorous ophelia thee
But soft you, the fair Ophelia: Ope not thy ponderous and marble jaws, But get thee to a nunnery - go! Mark Twain
humorous modern inconvenience
... all the modern inconveniences ...
humorous ass harm
It is no harm to be an ass, if one is content to bray and not kick.
humorous years agony
I have attended operas, whenever I could not help it, for fourteen years now; I am sure I know of no agony comparable to the listening to an unfamiliar opera.
humorous names acting
...there isn't often anything in Wagner opera that one would call by such a violent name as acting.
humorous heart compassion
The humorist who invented trial by jury played a colossal practical joke upon the world, but since we have the system we ought to try and respect it. A thing which is not thoroughly easy to do, when we reflect that by command of the law a criminal juror must be an intellectual vacuum, attached to a melting heart and perfectly macaronian bowels of compassion.
humorous thinking church
I've always figured that if God wanted us to go to church a lot He'd have given us bigger behinds to sit on and smaller heads to think with. P. J. O'Rourke
humorous rome republican
The Democrats planned to fiddle while Rome burned. The Republicans were going to burn Rome, then fiddle.
humorous east-germany banned
East Germany was so total in its totalitarianism that everything was banned which wasn't compulsory.
humorous old-glory two
Each American embassy comes with two permanent features - a giant anti-American demonstration and a giant line for American visas. Most demonstrators spend half their time burning Old Glory and the other half waiting for green cards.
humorous america republican
The Democrats said, "We don't know what's wrong with America, but we can fix it." The Republicans said, "There's nothing wrong with America, and we can fix that."
humorous light hands
I was told to hand over my disposable lighter, to prevent, I suppose, any threat of "Do what I say or I'll light this Marlboro and you'll all die - in thirty years due to inhalation of secondhand smoke."
humorous mean air
Modern air travel means less time spent in transit. That time is now spent in transit lounges.
humorous japan economy
The Russians could have some (warheads) aimed at Japan, so if we act up they can destroy our economy.
humorous russia cards
It was to be a short visit for the G-shevs. More than four days in the U.S. and Raisa's VISA card bill would shatter the fragile Soviet economy.
humorous rights russia
It had never occurred to us that the Kremlin's new anti-booze campaign would apply to journalists. Now, that's a human-rights violation.
humorous thinking ideas
America is not a wily, sneaky nation. We don't think that way. We don't think much at all, thank God. Start thinking and pretty soon you get ideas, and then you get idealism, and the next thing you know you've got ideology, with millions dead in concentration camps and gulags.
humorous party government
The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it.
humorous long able
He was a long, stripy policeman, who flowed out of his uniform at odd spots, as if Nature, setting out to make a constable, had had a good deal of material left over which she had not liked to throw away but hardly seemed able to fit into the general scheme. P. G. Wodehouse
humorous pieces puppy
It looked something like a pen wiper and something like a piece of hearth-rug. A second and keener inspection revealed it as a Pekinese puppy.
humorous hair getting-older
There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
humorous hunting ideas
It was a confusion of ideas between him and one of the lions he was hunting in Kenya that had caused A. B. Spottsworth to make the obituary column. He thought the lion was dead, and the lion thought it wasn't
humorous voice numbers
The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.
humorous writing ladders
Every author really wants to have letters printed in the papers. Unable to make the grade, he drops down a rung of the ladder and writes novels.
humorous men blow
The name of a man is a numbing blow from which he never recovers. Marshall McLuhan
humor sneak-in trying
But if you don't watch me, I will try and sneak in some humor. I see humor everywhere in life around me. Marion Ross
humor band traitor
Of all the band of personal traitors the sense of humor is the most dangerous. Margery Allingham
humor inability remember
The inability to forget is far more devastating than the inability to remember.
humor mean support
Humor, to be comprehensible to anybody, must be built upon a foundation with which he is familiar. If he can't see the foundation the superstructure is to him merely a freak -- like the Flatiron building without any visible means of support -- something that ought to be arrested.
humor laughing genius
The true and lasting genius of humour does not drag you thus to boxes labelled 'pathos,' 'humour,' and show you all the mechanism of the inimitable puppets that are going to perform. How I used to laugh at Simon Tapperwit, and the Wellers, and a host more! But I can't do it now somehow; and time, it seems to me, is the true test of humour. It must be antiseptic.
humor space shooting-up
Probably there is an imperceptible touch of something permanent that one feels instinctively to adhere to true humour, whereas wit may be the mere conversational shooting up of "smartness"--a bright feather, to be blown into space the second after it is launched...Wit seems to be counted a very poor relation to Humour....Humour is never artificial.
humor cat laughing
I pity the fellow who has to create a dialect or paraphrase the dictionary to get laughs. I can't spell, but I have never stooped to spell cat with a 'k' to get at your funny bone. I love a drink, but I never encouraged drunkenness by harping on its alleged funny side.
humor thinking years
So you see, the quality of humor is not a personal or a national monopoly. It's as free as salvation, and, I am afraid, far more widely distributed. But it has its value, I think. The hard and sordid things of life are too hard and too sordid and too cruel for us to know and touch them year after year without some mitigating influence, some kindly veil to draw over them, from time to time, to blur the craggy outlines, and make the thorns less sharp and the cruelties less malignant.