Joan Rivers
Joan Rivers
Joan Alexandra Molinsky, better known as Joan Rivers, was an American comedian, actress, writer, producer, and television host noted for her often controversial comedic persona—where she was alternately self-deprecating or sharply acerbic, especially toward celebrities and politicians...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth8 June 1933
CountryUnited States of America
husband thinking pieces
I don't think I'm good in bed. My husband never said anything, but after we made love he'd take a piece of chalk and outline my body.
girl men years
Remember a few years ago when they left Bea Arthur out of the death reel at the Oscars? Bea Arthur! How did they leave Bea Arthur out? She was in Mame; she was in All in the Family; she was in Maude; she was a Golden Girl, for God's sake! Bea was not only one of Hollywood's leading ladies, she was one of Hollywood's leading men!
baby children thinking
Everyone thinks Angelina Jolie was the first celebrity baby hoarder, but she wasn't. Before Angelina there was Mia Farrow. Mia had an entire farm full of children. I think she got them at Costco.
water hell holy
I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it.
gay icons rue
The only street I like is Rue Honore de Balzac, because 'Balzac' sound so gay, and I love my gays. I might like Parisians more if they named their streets only for gay icons, like Rue Liza Minnelli or Rue Bette Midler or, my favorite, Rue McClanahan.
believe gay men
Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but I believe when a woman enters a room, men should stand up - and gay men should stand up at least halfway.
thinking people matter
I've learned from my dealings with Johnny Carson that no matter what kind of friendship you think you have with people you're working with, when the chips are down, it's all about business.
writing sweaters guy
I was so flat I used to put Xs on my chest and write: "You are here". I wore angora sweaters just so the guys would have something to pet.
acting looks lines
If you're saying the same line 10 times and making it look like you just came up with it, that's acting.
girl mother lasts
I was the last girl in Larchmont, NY to get married. My mother had a sign up: "Last Girl Before Freeway."
doors years car
When you first get married, they open the car door for you. Eighteen years now...once he opened the car door for me in the last four years - we were on the freeway at the time.
sex husband breathing
I have no sex appeal, which kills me. The only way I can ever hear heavy breathing from my husband's side of the bed is when he's having an asthma attack.
sex nice men
The nice thing about Viagra is that they are proving men can go blind on it, so you can gain weight and have a great sex life.
baby nice birth
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes had the baby. He was there for the birth. It would've been nice if he was there for the conception.