Doug Stanhope
Doug Stanhope
Douglas Stanhope is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and author known for his cynical and controversial comedy style and libertarian political views...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 March 1967
CityWorcester, MA
CountryUnited States of America
sex children two
Sex and children are the two things that delude logic the most in this society.
children writing cards
There's nothing funnier than getting a death threat via MySpace. Why don't you just write it in a children's birthday card.
children police crime
Child pornography is the only crime that you cannot report to the police as an eyewitness.
children what-if freedom-of-speech
I'll defend child pornography, how about that? What's wrong with seeing some child pornography? What if you watch child pornography because you find it hilarious? Then should it not a protected freedom of speech?
children believe thinking
Abortion is green! I think its irrefutable, but people don't want to hear that. For most people, having children is an instinctual, natural desire and the last thing they want to do is believe that it has any detrimental side, or if they do believe it, they think it's different for them because they live in a gated community or whatever the reason...
children hate people
You say you hate children and people always say the same thing; it would be different if it was your own child. Well what if it wasn't?
children drinking people
Every 17 seconds a child dies on this planet from no clean drinking water. Good. Let's try to speed it up... there are too many people.
children parent language
If you're offended by any word in any language, it's probably because your parents were unfit to raise a child.
athletic good musical
I had no musical or athletic ability, and I wasn't particularly good looking. Comedy was something I could do for attention.
brain comedy crafted element fact fraudulent months night rolling root though weeks
There's a fraudulent root element of comedy in that we say things night after night as though they are rolling effortlessly from the brain and off the tongue, when in fact they are crafted over weeks and months and years.
running topics towns
I love playing in the UK because there are some topics that you just can't talk about in the States without getting run out of town. So let me just say this: Louis C. K.'s new show sucks.
dying mouths tadpoles
"This is Lakshmi Singh." It's like a tadpole dying in muck. Take a drink. Wet your mouth.
littles arizona towns
When I used to drive on the road from L. A., one time in Arizona we went off-road to see what weird little towns are around. Loved Bisbee.
car house drug
There's a lot of meth [in Bisbee]. So there's an ex-cop-car Tahoe and a BE DRUG FREE van parked right in front of my house.