Doug Stanhope
Doug Stanhope
Douglas Stanhope is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and author known for his cynical and controversial comedy style and libertarian political views...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 March 1967
CityWorcester, MA
CountryUnited States of America
drug done needs
If you have a good product. You don't need to advertise. You've done drugs? Did you ever see them advertised?
favors needs killing-yourself
If you're going to kill yourself just do me one favor: say it was because of my act. Can you do that? I need the press.
men america dollars
Man, it just cost me five dollars to beat my own meat... God bless the United States of America.
ideas years bored
I am 42 years old and I have $9000, and I am out of ideas. I've nothing to spend it on. I'm bored shitless. I will die with that $9000.
girl moon eggs
Why even moon a sorority girl if they can't see the swingy egg bag part of it?
lines spirit adventurous
There's a fine line between being a sicko and an adventurous spirit.
drug drank
I drank, smoked and did drugs to get where I'm at.
military college people
Some people just join the military because they need college money. Then they're idiots and college wasn't going to help.
sleep trying sober
Did you ever try to sleep sober?
wall yelling drunk
I'm pretty drunk and bored with yelling at the stone walls that are your minds.
people comedy miserable
Unfortunately this is where comedy works, where people are the most miserable.
support drug suvs
Drugs support terrorism? No, your SUV supports terrorism.
mean parent mouths
If you get offended by words - by noises we make with our mouths - it means you were raised by bad parents.
pussy flaws mankind
Pussy really is the ultimate motivator of all mankind. No, don't clap, this is a flaw in the system!