Doug Stanhope
Doug Stanhope
Douglas Stanhope is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and author known for his cynical and controversial comedy style and libertarian political views...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 March 1967
CityWorcester, MA
CountryUnited States of America
respect men ease
The characteristic of a well-bred man is, to converse with his inferiors without insolence, and with his superiors with respect and with ease.
christian jesus sorry
Democracy is the worst kind of government, I'm sorry. Would you still call yourself a Christian if they elected a new Jesus every four years?
people acting hollywood
The whole acting and Hollywood [thing], it's just work to me. Stand-up comedy ruins you so badly for doing television. I don't really need to be known anymore than I am. The slight sliver of fame I do have is hard to deal with. If I was actually well-known - I don't even know what to say to people who are at my show when I walk into the venue, much less having waitresses in diners asking for my autograph.
taken racism might
Comedy can always be taken the wrong way. If I do a bit that is meant to diffuse racism or sexism, Im not going to avoid it on the chance that a small portion of the audience might take it the wrong way.
balls ugly weakness
When you come out of that pink ugly hole onto this planet you're nothing but a gooey shrieking wrinkled ball of weakness.
thinking gun make-you-think
We have no healthcare and we have all the guns in the world, it makes you think twice before you start throwing punches in a bar.
funny clueless humor
At least black people knew when they were slaves; you remain clueless.
hate people different
People hate people just cause they want someone different to hate.
children drinking people
Every 17 seconds a child dies on this planet from no clean drinking water. Good. Let's try to speed it up... there are too many people.
drinking benefits smoke
I'm not saying drinking is all that great but you know it's got benefits; you can't smoke somebody pretty.
people acquiescence opinion
Abject flattery and indiscriminate assentation degrade, as much as indiscriminate contradiction and noisy debate disgust. But a modest assertion of one's own opinion, and a complaisant acquiescence in other people's, preserve dignity.
people trying used
People talk to you and they try to convince you that they like what they do just because it sucks less than what they used to do... which sucked a lot.
definitions used ruined
High definition ruined a lot of things that I used to hold sacrosanct in pornography.
people mediocre intellect
I am a very mediocre intellect, at best, and I am smarter than most people I know - and that terrifies me.