Quotes about hilarious
hilarious men two
Men have only two emotions: hungry and horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist.
hilarious men issues
On one issue, at least, men and women agree. They both distrust women. H. L. Mencken
hilarious funny-life food
The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one. Erma Bombeck
hilarious cutting tree
The old woman was the kind who would not cut down a large old tree because it was a large old tree. Flannery O'Connor
hilarious oxygen credit
Now airlines charge for everything... If the oxygen mask drops, you have to swipe your credit card to start the flow of the oxygen. Ellen DeGeneres
hilarious light letters
Introducing 'Lite': the new way to spell 'Light'; but with twenty per cent fewer letters. Jerry Seinfeld
hilarious lying people
People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to.
hilarious clothes covering
I wouldn't feel right wearing clothes covering my body. Christina Aguilera
hilarious retarded starbucks
I love any movie that has a retarded person working at Starbucks. Chris Kattan
hilarious mistake female
And certainly, the mistakes that we male and female mortals make when we have our own way might fairly raise some wonder that we are so fond of it. George Eliot
hilarious girl fearless
It's so trendy, almost bleeding to death. All the cool girls are doing it. Francine Pascal
hilarious individual life offbeat views
He's a hilarious individual with one of the most devastatingly offbeat views of life one could ever encounter.
hilarious circles pure
The limited circle is pure. Franz Kafka
hilarious machines my-favorite
My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine. Caroline Rhea
hilarious impressionists promiscuous
I went out with a promiscuous impressionist. She did everybody. Jay London
hilarious stars school
If you're a kid who was not especially a star in your high school, I recommend going to a college in the middle of nowhere. I got all the attention I could ever have wanted. Mindy Kaling
hilarious silly men
Committee - a group of men who keep minutes and waste hours. Milton Berle
hilarious book library
The problem with life is, by the time you can read women like a book, your library card has expired.
hilarious chickens fishes
Is this chicken or is this fish? Jessica Simpson
hilarious texas people
I'm not anorexic. I'm from Texas. Are there people from Texas that are anorexic? I've never heard of one. And that includes me.
hilarious law gentleman
There is only one immutable law in life - in a gentleman's toilet, incoming traffic has the right of way. Hugh Leonard
hilarious book illustration
My life is an open book. With illustrations. Hugh Hefner
hilarious people eras
Motown, Motown, that's my era. Those are my people. Hillary Clinton
hilarious children believe
The best time to give advice to your children is while they're still young enough to believe you know what you're talking about. Evan Esar
hilarious retarded stills
I still love her. But she's retarded, too. Guy Ritchie
hilarious himself moments overcome surrounded together
It made for some hilarious moments to see him and his friends try to overcome these issues. He surrounded himself with his friends who had no idea how to put together anything like this.
hilarious character body
I was born with an adult head and a tiny body. Like a 'Peanuts' character. Jon Stewart
hilarious cosmetics three
I can't even get three weeks off to have cosmetic surgery. Paul Lynde
hilarious sugar
What are you looking at sugar-tits? Mel Gibson
hilarious greek fats
I didn't have a big fat Greek wedding, but I have a lot of fat Greek friends. Pete Sampras
hilarious being-alone feeling-alone
The best part about being alone is that you really don't have to answer to anybody. You do what you want. Justin Timberlake
hilarious ideas literature
No ideas and the ability to express them - that's a journalist. Karl Kraus
hilarious england needs
English? Who needs that? I'm never going to England. Matt Groening