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hilarious military flower
If women were in charge of all the world's nations, there would be sincerely believe this - no military conflicts, and when there WAS a military conflict, everybody involved would feel just awful and there would soon be a high-level exchange of notes written on greeting cards with flowers on the front, followed by a Peace Luncheon Dave Barry
hilarious loneliness being-alone
I don't want to be alone, I want to be left alone. Audrey Hepburn
hilarious husband giving
I am truly not one to give advice. I'm divorced and I stole my best friend's husband. Denise Richards
hilarious fun giving
When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back. Bill Watterson
hilarious two cards
Everyone should be able to do one card trick, tell two jokes, and recite three poems, in case they are ever trapped in an elevator. Daniel Handler
hilarious lying ifs
If you have something to say and say nothing, you are really telling a lie. Ashleigh Brilliant
hilarious looks unexpected
Look how often the unexpected happens - yet we still never expect it.
hilarious believe fate
One possible reason that I don't believe in fate is that I wasn't fated to.
hilarious since tall
Since he's so tall and so big it was hilarious to see him do it. Quintyn Eldridge
depressing people grandfather
This is not to say that the Scots are not fine people, but they were all sort of... well, my grandfather was a minister and sort of Protestant, and this was rather depressing to me. Alan Hovhaness
depressing strive method
Scorn also to depress thy competitor by any dishonest or unworthy method; strive to raise thyself above him only by excelling him; so shall thy contest for superiority be crowned with honour, if not with success. Akhenaton
depressing writing thinking
It can take years. With the first draft, I just write everything. With the second draft, it becomes so depressing for me, because I realize that I was fooled into thinking I'd written the story. I hadn't-I had just typed for a long time. So then I have to carve out a story from the 25 or so pages. It's in there somewhere-but I have to find it. I'll then write a third, fourth, and fifth draft, and so on. David Sedaris
depressing beer being-sad
What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may seem like an absolute scream to another person, especially if he has had between four and seven beers.
depressing war levers
The United States tried, by depressing the clutch of diplomacy and downshifting the gearshift lever of rhetoric, to remain neutral, but it became increasingly obvious that the nation was going to get into a war, especially since it was almost 1812.
depressing feel-good feelings
You should never pick up a newspaper when you're feeling good, because every newspaper has a special department, called the Bummer Desk, which is responsible for digging up depressing front-page stories.
depressing fun saving
Have fun saving the world, or you are just going to depress yourself. David R. Brower
depressing thinking creative
Mind is infinitely creative. And when it's not stuck, that's where the joy comes from. Something happens, and the way we think about it, understand it, see it, is actually hilarious, whereas before it used to depress us. Byron Katie
depressing art mean
What art should be about,' they will say, 'is revealing exquisite and resonant truths about the human condition.' Well, to be honest - no, it shouldn’t. I mean, it can occasionally, if it wants to; but really, how many penetrating insights to human nature do you need in one lifetime? Two? Three? Once you’ve realised that no one else has a clue what they’re doing, either, and that love can be totally pointless, any further insights into human nature just start getting depressing really. Caitlin Moran
hands feelings excess
The victims of ennui paralyze all the grosser feelings by excess, and torpify all the finer by disuse and inactivity. Disgusted with this world, and indifferent about another, they at last lay violent hands upon themselves, and assume no small credit for the sang froid with which they meet death. But, alas! such beings can scarcely be said to die, for they have never truly lived. Charles Caleb Colton
hands class two
Literature has her quacks no less than medicine, and they are divided into two classes; those who have erudition without genius, and those who have volubility without depth; we shall get second-hand sense from the one, and original nonsense from the other.
hands sorrow tears
If I dropped a tear upon your hand, may it wither it up! If I spoke a gentle word in your hearing, may it deafen you! If I touched you with my lips, may the touch be poison to you! A curse upon this roof that gave me shelter! Sorrow and shame upon your head! Ruin upon all belonging to you! Charles Dickens
hands feet office
Skewered through and through with office-pens, and bound hand and foot with red tape.
hands library grew
I grew up on second hand bookshops and libraries. Charles Stross
hands soul half
I would rather lay my soul asoak in half a dozen verses [of the Bible] all day than rinse my hand in several chapters. Charles Spurgeon
hands despair rope
Faith has a saving connection with Christ. Christ is on the shore, so to speak, holding the rope, and as we lay hold of it with the hand of our confidence, He pulls us to shore; but all good works having no connection with Christ are drifted along down the gulf of fell despair.
hands soap calling
There’s no shame about any honest calling; don’t be afraid of soiling your hands, there’s plenty of soap to be had.
hands ignorant used
And it came to pass that in the hands of the ignorant, the words of the Bible were used to beat plowshares into swords Alan Watts