Famous Quotes & Sayings

Gerard Way

One time, Bert and I were making out for so long it wasn't even funny..But then it was funny.

Jimmy Swaggart

I gave my heart to the Lord, and I remember the incident vividly. The Lord spoke to me. I know that sounds funny. It was not an audible voice or anything of that nature.

Jane Bryant Quinn

The shortest period of time lies between the minute you put some money away for a rainy day and the unexpected arrival of rain.

Jane Austen

One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.

Jane Austen

For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbors and laugh at them in our turn?

Jane Austen

Every man is surrounded by a neighborhood of voluntary spies.

Jane Austen

Where so many hours have been spent in convincing myself that I am right, is there not some reason to fear I may be wrong?

Albert Camus

It's a kind of spiritual snobbery that makes people think they can be happy without money.

Albert Camus

Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.

Annie Leibovitz

No one ever thought Clint Eastwood was funny, but he was.

Clay Shirky

So forget about blogs and bloggers and blogging and focus on this - the cost and difficulty of publishing absolutely anything, by anyone, into a global medium, just got a whole lot lower. And the effects of that increased pool of potential producers is going to be vast.

Daniel J. Boorstin

Education is learning what you didn't even know you didn't know.

Cullen Hightower

Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else's can shorten it.

Clifton Fadiman

A sense of humor is the ability to understand a joke-and that the joke is oneself.

Clifton Fadiman

Muhammad Ali: Superman Don't need no seat belt. Flight Attendant: Superman Don't need no airplane, either.

Clifton Fadiman

For most men, life is a search for the proper Manila envelope in which to get themselves filed.

Clint Eastwood

This film cost $31 million. With that kind of money I could have invaded some country.

Clint Eastwood

They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning.

Clint Eastwood

I have a very strict gun control policy: if there's a gun around, I want to be in control of it.

Clarence Darrow

Everybody is a potential murderer. I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.

Clarence Darrow

Hoover, if elected, will do one thing that is almost incomprehensible to the human mind: he will make a great man out of Coolidge.

Clarence Darrow

I am a friend of the working man, and I would rather be his friend, than be one.

Clarence Darrow

Even if you do learn to speak correct English, whom are you going to speak it to?

Clarence Darrow

I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure - that is all that agnosticism means.

Clarence Darrow

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.

David Frost

For those of you haven't read the book, it's being published tomorrow

David Frost

The creed of the Inland Revenue is simple: "If we can bring one little smile to one little face today, then somebody's slipped up somewhere."

David Friedman

The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is generally employed only by small children and large nations.

David Coleman

Don't tell those coming in the final result of that fantastic match, but let's just have another look at Italy's winning goalo.

Dave Bautista

Kissing babies and hugging fat girls.

Dave Attell

I watch the Discovery Channel, and you know what I've discovered? I need a girlfriend.

Dave Attell

My cousin had a baby and I was watching her breastfeed for a couple of bucks, and I'll tell you ladies: it's amazing.

Dave Attell

Aspirin will not bring dead hookers back to life.