Famous Quotes & Sayings

Nicki Minaj

I'm in my dressing room about to play to a sold-out crowd at the O2 arena in Ireland. Name a female rapper who's ever done that and I will give you $100,000.

Nicki Minaj

I'mma just do me, when it feel right.

Nick Offerman

I would like Americans to make things with their hands. Thomas Jefferson and I feel that makes for a much stronger nation.

Marv Albert

Steve Kerr, now coaching Golden State after eight tumultuous and very inconsistent years at TNT.

Mark Twain

The idea that no gentleman ever swears is all wrong. He can swear and still be a gentleman if he does it in a nice and benevolent and affectionate way.

Mark Twain

If there are no cigars in heaven, I shall not go.

Mark Twain

How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand.

Mark Twain

A tax is a fine for doing well, a fine is a tax for doing wrong.

Mark Twain

A man with a hump-backed uncle mustn't make fun of another man's cross-eyed aunt

Nicholas Sparks

I had no choice. Love does funny things to people.

Nicholas Sparks

I may be irresponsible but I am a good irresponsible.

John Green

High school is neither a democracy nor a dictatorship - nor, contrary to popular belief, an anarchic state. High school is a divine-right monarchy. And when the queen goes on vacation, things change.

Pat Summerall

If only faces could talk...

Pat Williams

What do you have when you have an agent buried up to his neck in sand? Not enough sand.

P. D. James

We English are good at forgiving our enemies; it releases us from the obligation of liking our friends.

P. J. O'Rourke

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

P. J. O'Rourke

A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat.

P. J. O'Rourke

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

P. J. O'Rourke

Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.

P. J. O'Rourke

Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.

P. J. O'Rourke

Never fight an inanimate object.

P. J. O'Rourke

Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

P. J. O'Rourke

Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.

P. J. O'Rourke

It's the squares who know how to fly the fighter planes and operate the missiles and the bombs and work the M-16s. Liberals would still be fumbling with the federally mandated trigger locks.

Ozzy Osbourne

Of all the things I've lost I miss my mind the most.

P. G. Wodehouse

She had a penetrating sort of laugh. Rather like a train going into a tunnel.

P. G. Wodehouse

An apple a day, if well aimed, keeps the doctor away.

P. G. Wodehouse

Golf, like measles, should be caught young.

P. G. Wodehouse

Has anybody ever seen a dramatic critic in the daytime? Of course not. They come out after dark, up to no good.

P. G. Wodehouse

Sudden success in golf is like the sudden acquisition of wealth. It is apt to unsettle and deteriorate the character.

P. G. Wodehouse

It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.

Paul Newman

The embarrassing thing is that my salad dressing is out-grossing my films.

Paul Epworth

One of the funny things of being a producer, you have these fleeting, intense relationships with people, and they go off to global megastardom, and you don't see them.