Famous Quotes & Sayings

Jose Cruz

It started to really tighten up after the first inning, and after that it got really, really funny, ... It was weird, a different type of pain, so I just got out of there as a precaution. But they tested it here, and it was nothing.

It's kind of funny that we have a skate park and we can't even skate because they lock it up. It's kind of bull....

It's kind of funny now because that was never the thing I wanted to be known for.

James E. Faust

True charity ought to begin in marriage, for it is a relationship that must be rebuilt every day.

Jarvis Cocker

I recently spent quite a bit of time in Sheffield, England, which is where I'm from. I wouldn't move back there, but it's funny when you spend a bit of time in the place where you were brought up. You kind of realize how that place has had quite a big effect on you or made you a certain way.

Janeane Garofalo

I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half-empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.

Jane Pauley

This may sound funny, but as much as the 'Today' show matured me, it also was something of a cocoon. I'd been happy there. I never went into the boss's office and pounded my fist on the desk, saying, 'Give me more money! Give me a prime-time show!'

Ethan Hawke

The kindest compliments I have ever heard are when cops tell me Training Day and Assault on Precinct 13 inspired them to become cops. The funniest compliments I have ever heard are when people tell me that 'I love your band Sugar Ray.

Errol Flynn

It isn't what they say about you, it's what they whisper.

Errol Flynn

My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income.

Ernesto Sábato

The first time I passed through the country (Switzerland) I had the impression it was swept down with a broom from one end to the other every morning by housewives who dumped all the dirt in Italy.

Ernest Thompson Seton

Not Carnegie, Vanderbilt, and Astor together could have raised money enough to buy a quarter share in my little dogs.

Ernest Shackleton

Men Wanted for Dangerous Expedition: Low Wages for Long Hours of Arduous Labour under Brutal Conditions; Months of Continual Darkness and Extreme Cold; Great Risk to Life and Limb from Disease, Accidents and Other Hazards; Small Chance of Fame in Case of Success.

Ernest Bevin

If you open that Pandora's Box you never know what Trojan 'orses will jump out.

Cassandra Clare

That sounds terrific, thought Cary, just you, your comatose wife your shell-shocked son, and your daughter who hates your guts. Not to mention that your two kids may be in love with each other. Yeah, that sounds like a perfect family reunion.

Cassandra Clare

If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now.

Caroline Rhea

Before we got engaged, he never farted. Now it's a second language.

Caroline Rhea

Someone told me that when they go to Vermont, they feel like they're home. I'm that way at Saks.

Carmelo Anthony

I think I'm the most underrated superstar that's out there, but that doesn't matter to me.

Kai Ryssdal

The funny thing is, I really feel it if I don't run. I start getting sluggish, and I feel like I need to do it. That's how I know that the workouts are working - I miss them if I don't have them.

Kirby Bliss Blanton

I hear that I'm funny, and I think I'm funny, but I go in all the time for multicam, and they say that I'm not big enough, or I'm too big. I'm so confused. Okay, well, I'm funny in real life.

Eva Gabor

I believe in loyalty. When a woman reaches an age she likes, she should stick with it.

Cassandra Clare

Other crack teams get bat boomerangs and wall-climbing powers; we get Aquatruck.

Muriel Spark

We often laughed at others in our house, and I picked up the craft of being polite while people were present and laughing later if there was anything to laugh about.

Mo Williams

The way he was playing, he probably could have scored on Jesus.

Mo Williams

I'm no different than any other expendable player.

Moby

Better a loving single-parent family than a 'conventional' family where the parents hate each other and the father is a demagogue.

Mindy Kaling

It used to be that you had to make female TV characters perfect so no one would be offended by your 'portrayal' of women. Even when I started out on 'The Office' eight years ago, we could write our male characters funny and flawed, but not the women. And now, thankfully, it's completely different.

Mindy Kaling

When I was a little kid, I wrote this play about all these characters living in a haunted house. There was a witch who lived there, and a mummy. When they were all hassling him, this guy who bought the house - I can't believe I remember this - he said to them, 'Who's paying the mortgage on this haunted house?' I thought that was really funny.

Mindy Kaling

People don't want to listen to a celebrity tweeting about their charities and shows. That's why comedy writers do well - we put out little funny ideas.

Mindy Kaling

The funniest racism is the racism between minorities. It's something you don't see dramatized, but almost every minority I know who's my age, they have these funny stories about their parents stereotyping other minorities.

Mindy Kaling

There are so many distractions you can face as a woman, either with relationships or worrying about, Should I go to this party? or, Should I be doing this to help me get ahead? All [success] is, is doing your work and staying focused. It's boring advice, but boring good advice is what you can get from me!

Mindy Kaling

There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it.