Quotes about funny
funny errors precision
Be precise. A lack of precision is dangerous when the margin of error is small. Donald Rumsfeld
funny might masters
You might be a cunning linguist, but I am a master debater.
funny sports football
Sure, luck means a lot in football. Not having a good quarterback is bad luck. Don Shula
funny dog blood
Yes, he's got all them different kinds of thoroughbred blood in him, and he's got other kinds you ain't mentioned and that you ain't slick enough to see. Don Marquis
funny pregnancy humor
It takes all sorts of people to make the underworld.
funny birthday time
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever.
funny birthday meaningful
Of middle age the best that can be said is that a middle-aged person has likely learned how to have a little fun in spite of his troubles.
funny-inspirational business work
Punctuality is one of the cardinal business virtues: always insist on it in your subordinates.
funny humor admission
A sequel is an admission that you've been reduced to imitating yourself.
funny hope witty
Every cloud has its silver lining but it is sometimes a little difficult to get it to the mint.
funny life witty
A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.
funny wwe dots
What am I thankful for? MY POLKA DOTS!! Dusty Rhodes
funny wwe
Now go back to Supercuts and get your $5 back jabroni! Dwayne Johnson
funny running rocks
How dare you little jabroni come onto The Rock shows Smackdown and run your mouth about how your the game, well The Rock says, if you are the game then you quite frankly you need to go back to the drawing board cause your game absolutely sucks!
funny rocks wwe
Let The Rock understand this, he beats your ass in cage match last week and now your the number 1 contender? Well The Rock knows exactly why that is; you've got a three foot nose you turn it sideways and stick it straight up Vince's ass!
funny wwe jumping
And then all of a sudden, you're doing jumping jacks, you're happy, because Kane can talk. The Big Red Retard can finally speak.
funny sweet ice
Sweet cream on an ice cream sandwich!
funny wwe rocks
You wanna do this...you wanna go right now...do you want to, GO?...then go get The Rock a bologna sandwich because this doesn't concern you.
funny dog mean
Ever consider what pets must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth! Anne Tyler
funny beautiful sports
I am beautiful, famous and gorgeous. Anna Kournikova
funny-inspirational feminism firsts
She watched the first episode and she was like, 'This is feminism?' And then by the end of the season, she was like, 'This is feminism.' The tone changed completely. She was really psyched about it. Allison Williams
funny thinking thoughtful
One might feel that, at my age, I should look on life with more gravity. After all, I've been privileged to listen, firsthand, tosome of the most profound thinkers of my daywho were all beset by gloom over the condition the world had gotten into. Then why can't I view it with anything but amusement? Anita Loos
funny-life amusing
Life's more amusing than we thought. Andrew Lang
funny humorous men
An unsophisticated forecaster uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts - for support rather than for illumination.
funny happiness happy
Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another. Ambrose Bierce
funny hope giving-up
Litigant. A person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bones.
funny country believe
What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
funny jealousy sarcastic
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
funny drinking humorous
I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are Democrats.
funny moving humor
Abscond - to move in a mysterious way, commonly with the property of another.
funny sloth laziness
Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.
funny-relationship heart psychology
In the algebra of psychology, X stands for a woman's heart.
funny military enemy
General," said the commander of the delinquent brigade, "I am persuaded that any further display of valor by my troops will bring them into collision with the enemy.