Steven Wright
Steven Wright
Steven Alexander Wrightis an American comedian, actor, writer, and an Oscar-winning film producer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical, and sometimes nonsensical jokes, paraprosdokians, non sequiturs, anti-humor, and one-liners with contrived situations...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth6 December 1955
CountryUnited States of America
birthday moving tired
I kept a diary right after I was born. Day 1: Tired from the move. Day 2: Everyone thinks I'm an idiot.
funny birthday humor
How young can you die of old age?
birthday aunt years
My aunt gave me a walkie-talkie for my birthday. She says if I'm good, she'll give me the other one next year.
funny humor 50th-birthday
For my sister's 50th birthday, I sent her a singing mammogram.
funny birthday hilarious
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
funny happy-birthday friends
I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'
funny birthday humor
For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.
phones ears mouths
Imagine how weird phones would look if your mouth was nowhere near your ears.
funny humor thinking
I think God's going to come down and pull civilization over for speeding.
harder run supposed system
We have run the hydro system harder than it was supposed to be run this year.
best defensive game
I think that was our best defensive game of the year.
ahead
I was just getting too ahead of myself. I was rushing.
bond effect factor line modelling per petrol remains rise suggest yields
Our modelling suggest bond yields should rise in line with the US by at least 1 per cent. The X factor remains any flow-on effect from petrol prices.
american-comedian bothers deep grow
Sponges grow in the ocean. This bothers me. How deep would it be if they didn't?