Steven Wright
Steven Wright
Steven Alexander Wrightis an American comedian, actor, writer, and an Oscar-winning film producer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical, and sometimes nonsensical jokes, paraprosdokians, non sequiturs, anti-humor, and one-liners with contrived situations...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth6 December 1955
CountryUnited States of America
funny humor use
If I ever had twins, I'd use one for parts.
funny firsts succeed
If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
birthday moving tired
I kept a diary right after I was born. Day 1: Tired from the move. Day 2: Everyone thinks I'm an idiot.
museums arms comedy
I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums.
cat half half-life
Do radioactive cats have eighteen half-lives?
school color naked
My school colors were clear. We used to say, 'I'm not naked, I'm in the band.
funny humor simple
I got a chain letter by fax. It's very simple. You just fax a dollar bill to everybody on the list.
emotion
I have all the emotions that everyone has; it just appears that I don't.
mother sleep night
When I was a fetus, I used to sneak out at night when my mother was sleeping. I figured I should start stealing stuff while I still had no fingerprints.
wish lasts firsts
I wish, when I was first born, the first thing I said was "Quote" so the last thing I said before I died would be "Unquote.
thinking race wake-up
It seems like we wake up and it's a race until you get to bed. It gets to you after a while and you think, 'What the hell am I doing?'
boston years phoenix
I never even thought of myself as deadpan until someone wrote an article about me about a year after I was doing comedy. There was a paper called the 'Boston Phoenix,' and someone wrote a description of what I was doing and that's where I first saw 'deadpan.'
funny humor barbie
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
placebo
I'm addicted to placebos.