Steven Wright
Steven Wright
Steven Alexander Wrightis an American comedian, actor, writer, and an Oscar-winning film producer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical, and sometimes nonsensical jokes, paraprosdokians, non sequiturs, anti-humor, and one-liners with contrived situations...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth6 December 1955
CountryUnited States of America
funny beach nature
I have the world's largest collection of seashells. I keep it on all the beaches of the world... perhaps you've seen it.
funny humor visionaries
I was a peripheral visionary. I could see the future, but only way off to the side.
funny humor furniture
While I was gone, somebody rearranged on the furniture in my bedroom. They put it in exactly the same place it was. When I told my roommate, he said: "Do I know you?"
funny time humor
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I'd doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I'm six I'll be ninety.
funny humor use
If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?
sleep naps consciousness
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps
inspirational life thinking
I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five.
coffee comedy break
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
funny-life redneck way
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
funny humor night
I stayed in a really old hotel last night. They sent me a wake-up letter.
funny ocean humor
How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn’t live there?
funny humor taste
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
funny birthday hilarious
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
love dream funny-inspirational
I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.