Steven Wright
Steven Wright
Steven Alexander Wrightis an American comedian, actor, writer, and an Oscar-winning film producer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical, and sometimes nonsensical jokes, paraprosdokians, non sequiturs, anti-humor, and one-liners with contrived situations...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth6 December 1955
CountryUnited States of America
night light looks
I changed my headlights the other day. I put in strobe lights instead! Now when I drive at night, it looks like everyone else is standing still ...
time sorry mind
Sorry... my mind was wandering... one time it went all the way to Venus and ordered a meal I couldn’t pay for.
funny humor people
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
kids laughing people
Like other kids wanted to become firemen or astronauts, I wanted to make people laugh.
watches stones i-can
The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney..
funny humor eating
Do fish get cramps after eating?
funny humor comedy
I invented the cordless extension cord.
funny humor cake
I made a chocolate cake with white chocolate. Then I took it to a potluck. I stood in line for some cake. They said, "Do you want white cake or chocolate cake?" I said, "yes."
funny humor orange
Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
funny humor swim
If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown too?
funny humor car
I had to stop driving my car for a while... the tires got dizzy.
flight non-stop
How do you get off a non-stop flight?
west internet wild-west
It's like the Wild West, the Internet. There are no rules.
morning stuff stolen
I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates".