Joan Rivers

Joan Rivers
Joan Alexandra Molinsky, better known as Joan Rivers, was an American comedian, actress, writer, producer, and television host noted for her often controversial comedic persona—where she was alternately self-deprecating or sharply acerbic, especially toward celebrities and politicians...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth8 June 1933
CountryUnited States of America
party humor night
But you do have to learn, if you want to be a satirist, you can't be part of the party. Meaning, you can't go horseback riding with Jackie O in Central Park if you're going to make a joke about her that night.
suicide party vanity
I've learned: When you get older, who cares? I don't mince words, I don't hold back. What are you gonna do to me? Fire me? It's been done. Threaten to commit suicide? Done. Take away my show? Done! Not invite to me to the Vanity Fair party? I've never been invited! If I ever saw the invitation, I'd use it as toilet paper.
regret party political
I've learned to have absolutely no regrets about any jokes I've ever done You can tune me out, you can click me off, it's OK. I am not going to bow to political correctness. But you do have to learn, if you want to be a satirist, you can't be part of the party.
favorite food seconds
Is she fat? Her favorite food is seconds
affair age heart talk
Dont talk to me about Valentines Day. At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!
beginning good
That was the beginning of a very good run.
developed humor
I was not a pretty child. I developed humor to be accepted.
american-comedian dishes hate later months six start wash
I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.
beginning comedy courage ego felt gave looking
I felt comedy ego beginning to grow, which gave me the courage to begin tentatively looking into myself for material.
dress name ought pathetic somebody
What a pathetic turn, ... Somebody ought to take that dress away from her. It's got Ronald McDonald's name on it.
break comedian solid today
We all started on his show, ... Every solid comedian today really got their break on the Carson show.
child face matter speak ugly
It's very important, and if it's the child, no matter how prepubescent or ugly it is, you always say, 'Don't you look great?' You speak to the child even if the face is a pizza.
baby carry display father per pictures wants whenever
Whenever there's a new baby in my family, even if I don't know who the father is, I display pictures of it. But only one or two per child. No one wants to see 37 pictures of your grandchild - which is also why you must never carry more than one picture of each grandchild in your wallet.
almost attainment barriers determine frequently resolution scales true
Where there is a will there is a way. is an old true saying. He who resolves upon doing a thing, by that very resolution often scales the barriers to it, and secures its achievement. To think we are able, is almost to be so - to determine upon attainment is frequently attainment itself.