Dylan Moran
Dylan Moran
Dylan William Moran is an Irish comedian, writer, actor and filmmaker. He is best known for his sardonic observational comedy, the UK television sitcom Black Booksand his work with Simon Pegg in Shaun of the Dead and Run Fatboy Run. He appeared as one of the two lead characters in the Irish black comedy titled A Film with Me in It in 2008...
NationalityIrish
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth3 November 1971
CityLondon, England
CountryIreland
I don't know what I want but I know that I want it now.
I never thought I want to do anything, really, except not go to work properly and turn up at the same place every day and eat sandwiches in the same canteen, if I can possibly help it, as I don't think I'd be very good at it.
Women are like canoes, full of soup. At first everyone is suspicious but then everyone wants one.
I'm quite a compulsive person-I only worked this out recently-I'm compulsive, but I'm also very indecisive. I don't know what I want, but I know that I want it now.
Idioms are a big thing in Ireland. They want to fill the time, to show how good they are at talk - it's a talk-off
I don't walk around knocking on doors and going to auditions and things generally. All the work I did was self-created.
I don't do drugs. If I want a rush I just get out of a chair when I'm not expecting it.
People walk past me in the street and look at me, but because they think I work in their office and they can't remember my name.
Its not easy being a man you know. I had to get dressed today and there are other pressures.
Men look at breasts the way women look at babies. 'Aw, isn't that lovely.'
You see the button with the guy with the tray, and you push it, AND HE ARRIVES WITH A SANDWICH! ...And you think: "Yes! Yes! I control sandwich monkey! I live in magic land, magic land, magic land"
You know it's a sad day when your child looks at you and asks 'Daddy, are these organic?'
Stand-up came naturally to me because people in Ireland talk. But that's not talking on panel shows; it is structured fun. It reminds me of some tragic aunt clapping her hands and bouncing into a room and announcing we should all play games... and if we don't we are all a rotten spoilsport.
When did you ever hear of a child not in need? 'Oh that's enough jam tart for me, I'll just go now and clean the toilets.'