Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin
Demetri Evan Martinis an American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer, and humorist. He is best known for his work as a stand-up comedian, being a contributor on The Daily Show, and his Comedy Central show Important Things with Demetri Martin...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 May 1973
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
whales people boat
I went whale watching once. It was very similar to watching people on a boat become disappointed.
hate shooting satisfying
Skeet shooting is probably more satisfying if you really hate skeets.
thinking ears tone
I'm not a lawmaker, but I was thinking that if you have a really loud ring tone, maybe you should be stabbed in the ear?
enemy sofas productivity
The sofa is the enemy of productivity.
thinking dancing bears
I think it would be worse to get mauled by a dancing bear than just a regular bear because you can't totally blame the dancing bear.
weather firsts sometimes
Sometimes I like to go outside without even checking the weather first.
dog cat looks
Dogs seem more photogenic than cats. In photos most cats look like sociopaths.
artist tiles bathroom
If I had to pick one artist to tile my bathroom I would go with MC Escher.
want crime turns
I want to commit a crime during a reenactment, and turn it into an enactment.
thinking pie littles
I think they should put pies on the fronts of trains, so that when they hit something it's at least a little bit funny.
bowling
I love bowling almost as much as I love not bowling.
looks slow-motion eating
A lot of things look cooler in slow motion. Eating isn't one of them.
writing tv-shows long
But long story short, I didn't start doing stand-up because I wanted to have a TV show or be an actor or even wanted to write sketch comedy. I got into stand-up because I love stand-up.
vampire fads make-sense
Vampire fad just won't die. Makes sense, I guess.