Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin
Demetri Evan Martinis an American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer, and humorist. He is best known for his work as a stand-up comedian, being a contributor on The Daily Show, and his Comedy Central show Important Things with Demetri Martin...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 May 1973
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
im-sorry squirrels car
People and squirrels are very different. Most people will not argue that. But I find that there is one situation in which they're very similar. And that is: when I am driving towards them in my car. Then they're kind of hard to tell apart - especially if the human is kind of hairy.
I love Steven Wright.
people disappointing good-things
But I found that disappointing people is a good thing, because disapproval is freedom.
movie fun acting
I have fun acting, and I want to do more of it, and I want to direct my own movie.
grateful average hendrix
I know about Woodstock probably as much as your average person who is over 30, where I'd know Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Grateful Dead.
funny humor thinking
There's a store in my neighborhood called Futon World. I like that name, 'Futon World.' Makes me think of a magical place that gets less and less comfortable over time.
short-love ideas punchlines
Specifically in stand-up, I love jokes. I love short, structured ideas and a punchline.
ideas simplicity trying
I am completely attracted to the idea of simplicity, or at least removing things that seem unnecessary when trying to get an idea out there.
good-morning hope im-sorry
I think that when you get dressed in the morning, sometimes you're really making a decision about your behavior for the day. Like if you put on flipflops, you're saying: 'Hope I don't get chased today.' 'Be nice to people in sneakers.'
funny cute girl
I love women, but I feel like you can't trust some of them. Some of them are liars, you know? Like I was in the park and I met this girl, she was cute and she had a dog. And I went up to her, we started talking. She told me her dog's name. Then I said, 'Does he bite?' She said, 'No.' And I said, 'Oh yeah? Then how does he eat?' Liar.
funny humor laughing
Whenever I'm on my computer, I don't type 'lol'. I type 'lqtm' - laugh quietly to myself. It's more honest.
funny humor months
Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner and a loser at the same time.
drunk persuasive dangerous
A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.
actors peter all-time
And as far as actors go, Peter Sellers is my all-time favorite.