Famous Quotes & Sayings

Bill Hicks

When two or more people agree on an issue, I form on the other side.

Bill Hicks

I ascribe to Mark Twain's theory that the last person who should be President is the one who wants it the most. The one who should be picked is the one who should be dragged kicking and screaming into the White House.

Kevin Chapman

I did a film called 'Black Dynamite' that was very, very funny. That seems to be a film that's kind of a cult classic.

John Krasinski

A good part's a good part. You can play serious and funny moments with a well-written role.

Jane Elliot

I love playing smart and tough and having funny lines.

Jim Larranaga

When the horn did it at the end, and it was blaring in my ears, I put the managers on the line and made them run. How funny do you think that was to our players?

Tommy Chong

I've met a lot of jazz musicians in my day, and they're all funny.

Barry Humphries

I was born with a priceless gift, the ability to laugh at the misfortunes of others.

Barry Goldwater

In your heart you know he's right.

Barry Goldwater

You don't have to be straight to be in the military; you just have to be able to shoot straight.

Barbara Boxer

Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, 'Thank God, I'm still alive.' But, of course, those who died, their lives will never be the same again.

Arthur Smith

Ninety-eight per cent of laughter is nothing to do with jokes, which do not deserve to bear the weight of all the funny stuff in the world.

Arthur Smith

The history of the relationship between comedy and swimming is short indeed. Of course it is always funny when someone falls into water, but that's about it.

Artie Shaw

People ask what those women saw in me. Let's face it, I wasn't a bad-looking stud. But that's not it. It's the music; it's standing up there under the lights. A lot of women just flip; looks have nothing to do with it. You call Mick Jagger good-looking?

Arthur Schopenhauer

To buy books would be a good thing if we also could buy the time to read them.

Arthur Schopenhauer

The person who writes for fools is always sure of a large audience.

Arthur Schopenhauer

Journalists are like dogs, when ever anything moves they begin to bark.

Aries Spears

Ladies Commit, There's A Wedding In It For You.

Aries Spears

I'm at a very frustrating point in my career because I'm not a millionaire. Like, people assume because you're in movies or TV, you're rich. I'm not rich, but I'm far from broke. I'm what you call a 'thousandaire.'

Aristotle Onassis

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.

Arjuna Ranatunga

You can find tea in a tea cup.. but cannot find world in a world cup.

Aphra Behn

Love ceases to be a pleasure, when it ceases to be a secret.

Bruce McCall

Six Secrets to Being a Successful Humorist 1. Be scared, unhappy, and an outcast as a kid. 2. Drop out of high school. 3. Spend time alone. 4. Don't take a comedy course. 5. Read other humorists but don't worship them. 6. Don't get your hopes up.

Bruce Lee

Put every great teacher in a room, and they'd agree about everything, but put their disciples in there and they'd argue about everything.

Brooke Shields

Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.

Bruce Baum

I don't know what's wrong with my television set. I was getting C-Span and the Home Shopping Network on the same station. I actually bought a congressman.

Bruce Baum

I don't kill flies but I like to mess with their minds. I hold them above globes. They freak out and yell, 'Whoa, I'm way too high!'

Brit Marling

That's the funny thing about cinema, it is an intellectual medium, but it's also sort of anti-intellectual.

Britney Spears

I find it so funny that people find me so interesting.

Britney Spears

Justin Timberlake is everything, and what more could you want in a person? He's funny. He's cute. He's great. He just understands. I get him and he gets me, and that's cool.

Britney Spears

I performed at Mom and Dad's party when I was four. Oh my gosh, I was singing a Madonna song, and I peed myself!

Britney Spears

As pissed as a fart in a vacuum cleaner.

Britney Spears

The cool thing about being famous is traveling. I have always wanted to travel across seas, like to Canada and stuff.