Famous Quotes & Sayings

Oscar Wilde

Tell the cook of this restaurant with my compliments that these are the very worst sandwiches in the whole world, and that, when I ask for a watercress sandwich, I do not mean a loaf with a field in the middle of it.

Oscar Wilde

If you pretend to be good, the world takes you very seriously. If you pretend to be bad, it doesn't. Such is the astounding stupidity of optimism.

Oscar Wilde

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.

Oscar Wilde

Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

Kami Garcia

Funny thing is, until I met you all I wanted to do was to get as far away from here as I could. Kind of ironic, isn't it? Can't get much farther away than where I"m going, and now I'd give anything to stay.

Kanye West

Love your haters - they're your biggest fans

June Carter Cash

Every dog has it's day, unless he loses his tail, then he has a weakend.

Julie Walters

I was asked about doing a nude shoot for men's magazine GQ. I thought it was the funniest thing I'd ever heard.

Maria Shriver

We all obsess about what we are doing and accomplishing. What if we let it go and simply made the way we live our lives our accomplishment?

Paul Theroux

You define a good flight by negatives: you didn't get hijacked, you didn't crash, you didn't throw up, you weren't late, you weren't nauseated by the food. So you are grateful.

Paul Krugman

It's a funny thing, by the way, how people who love free markets are also quite sure that they know that investors are being irrational.

Paul Krugman

Are you, or is someone you know, a gadget freak? If so, you doubtless know that Wednesday was iPhone 5 day, the day Apple unveiled its latest way for people to avoid actually speaking to or even looking at whoever they're with.

Paul Dickson

Allen's Law of Civilization: It is better for civilization to be going down the drain than to be coming up it.

Paul Dickson

Airplane Law, The: When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time.

Patrick Swayze

Good-looking people turn me off. Myself included.

Patrick Ewing

We might make a lot of money but, we also spend a lot of money.

Patrick Chan

Experience is a funny thing. You dont always have it when you need it.

Martin Luther

Whoever drinks beer, he is quick to sleep; whoever sleeps long, does not sin; whoever does not sin, enters Heaven! Thus, let us drink beer!

Nancy Astor

I refuse to admit that I am more than 52, even if that makes my children illegitimate.

Nancy Astor

In passing, also, I would like to say that the first time Adam had a chance he laid the blame on a woman.

Missy Elliot

If I didn't have some kind of education, then I wouldn't be able to count my money.

P. J. O'Rourke

It's the squares who know how to fly the fighter planes and operate the missiles and the bombs and work the M-16s. Liberals would still be fumbling with the federally mandated trigger locks.

Ozzy Osbourne

Of all the things I've lost I miss my mind the most.

P. G. Wodehouse

She had a penetrating sort of laugh. Rather like a train going into a tunnel.

P. G. Wodehouse

An apple a day, if well aimed, keeps the doctor away.

P. G. Wodehouse

Golf, like measles, should be caught young.

P. G. Wodehouse

Has anybody ever seen a dramatic critic in the daytime? Of course not. They come out after dark, up to no good.

P. G. Wodehouse

Sudden success in golf is like the sudden acquisition of wealth. It is apt to unsettle and deteriorate the character.

P. G. Wodehouse

It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.

Paul Newman

The embarrassing thing is that my salad dressing is out-grossing my films.

Paul Epworth

One of the funny things of being a producer, you have these fleeting, intense relationships with people, and they go off to global megastardom, and you don't see them.

Matt Groening

I’ll keep it short and sweet - Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.

Matt Groening

We've got a bunch of new writers now who tell me they grew up watching The Simpsons. It's bizarre, and they're writing some very funny stuff.