Rita Rudner
Rita Rudner
Rita Rudneris an American comedian, writer and actress. Beginning her career as a Broadway dancer, Rita Rudner noticed the lack of female comedians in New York City and turned her stage presence to stand-up comedy where she’s flourished for over three decades. Her performance on a variety of HBO specials and numerous appearances on the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, helped establish Rudner as one of the premiere female comics to emerge from the comedy boom of the 1980s...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth17 September 1953
CityMiami, FL
CountryUnited States of America
I suffer from peroxide phobia. Every time I've gotten near a blond woman, something of mine has disappeared. Jobs, boyfriends... one time an angora sweater leaped right off my body.
How can I have morning sickness when I don't get up till noon?
Oh, my God. I've just told you how old I am. Nobody knows how old I am. I'm going to have to kill you now.
I had the most boring office job in the world...I used to clean the windows on envelopes.
They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when they have one.
I'm a very simple person. I'm very shallow. Shallow, simple, easily pleased: that's me.
There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality better.
My new dress. Do you like it? It's from my favorite designer, On Sale.
All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. They don't understand them, and they don't want to get near them. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.
Men will now get up and walk with the baby in the middle of the night, change its diapers, and give it a bottle, but in their heart of hearts they still think they shouldn't have to.
Yes, I've now got this nice little apartment in New York, one of those L-shaped ones. Unfortunately, it's a lower case l.
I had teeth that stuck out so far, I used to eat other kids' candy bars by accident.
Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.
Why are women wearing perfumes that smell like flowers to attract men? Men don't like flowers. I have a great idea for a scent that will attract men - how about "New Car Interior"?