Jerry Seinfeld
Jerry Seinfeld
Jerome Allen "Jerry" Seinfeld is an American comedian, actor, director, writer, and producer...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth29 April 1954
CityBrooklyn, NY
CountryUnited States of America
inspirational fishes knows
You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish.
men organization groups
Men, as an organization, are getting more women than any other group working anywhere in the world. Wherever women are, we have men looking into it.
creativity thinking recipes
Sometimes I think more creativity is put into muffin recipes than into the rest of society combined.
thinking hair life-is
Life is truly a ride. We're all strapped in and no one can stop it.... I think that the most you can hope for at the end of life is that your hair's messed, you're out of breath, and you didn't throw up.
people would-be looks
If people would only *Look to the Cookie* - all our problems would be solved
people normal kind
[I like to] engage with funny people, or weird people, or, you know, kind of off people. [Whereas when I meet] anybody who's ... normal ... I'm not curious, I'm not interested.
running pain thinking
What is the story with the airport sinks, that they will not give us a twist-on twist-off human faucet. "Is it that too risky for the human population? We have to do the one-handed pain-in-the-ass Alcatraz-style faucets. "What is it they think we will do? Turn 'em all on full, run out into the parking lot, laughing, pushing each other into the bushes?
crazy ideas interesting
This is really a crazy idea, you know. It probably won't work, but that will be interesting, too. You have to motivate yourself with challenges. That's how you know you're still alive. Once you start doing only what you've already proven you can do, you're on the road to death.
drinking hands ideas
I like any cereal. I like the idea of just eating and drinking with one hand without looking.
special ems want
I don't want to hear the specials. If they're so special, put 'em on the menu.
phones meditation mind
It's like having... you know, your phone has a charger, right? It's like having a charger for your whole body and mind. That's what Transcendental Meditation is!
fans ends ifs
The Beatles created something that never trailed off. What a gift that was to their fans. If you're into the Beatles, you loved them from beginning to end.
change wall long
I was in the drug store the other day trying to get a cold medication...Not easy. There's an entire wall of products you need. You stand there going,"Well, this one is quick acting but this is long lasting...Which is more important, the present or the future?"
Festivus for the Restivus!