Jeff Foxworthy
Jeff Foxworthy
Jeffrey Marshall "Jeff" Foxworthyis an American stand-up comedian, actor, television and radio personality, author, and voice artist. He is a member of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, a comedy troupe which also comprises Larry the Cable Guy, Bill Engvall, and Ron White. Known for his "You might be a redneck" one-liners, Foxworthy has released six major-label comedy albums. His first two albums were each certified 3× Platinum by the Recording Industry Association of America. Foxworthy has written several books based...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth6 September 1958
CityAtlanta, GA
CountryUnited States of America
You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
You might be a redneck if the first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are Howdy!, Hey! or How Y'all Doin'?
You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.
You might be a redneck if your daughter's Barbie's Dream House has a clothesline in the front yard.
Whatever cleaning goes on on the planet, women do 99% of it. But see, women are not as proud of their 99% as men are of our one! We clean something up, we're gonna talk about it all year long. It might be on the news, you don't know. A woman could be out re-paving the driveway. Men actually have enough gall to walk out onto the porch and go Hey baby? Man, it's hot as hell out here! Look, don't worry about emptyin' that ashtray in the den, I done got it, all right? Did it for you, sweet pea. I'm gonna take a nap now.
Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
Thank God I'm at that point in my career where I don't have to take stuff that I don't really want to do.
I've gotten to the point I won't even watch the 11 o'clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is.
Women in bed are like Diesel engines. What I mean by that is, it may take them a while to get going, but when you do, they can go for a long, long time. Whereas men are like... bottle rockets.
You might be a redneck if the hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car.
You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.
You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life.