David Letterman
David Letterman
David Michael Lettermanis an American former television talk show host, comedian, and producer...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionTV Show Host
Date of Birth12 April 1947
CityIndianapolis, IN
CountryUnited States of America
dog believe thinking
But I was thinking about this, the Obamas want to adopt a stray dog from the pound. And I think that is admirable. I believe the last president to bring a stray dog into the White House got impeached.
dog toilets winner
The winner of the Westminster Dog Show gets to drink champagne - out of the toilet.
thanksgiving dog fun
When I was a kid in Indiana, we thought it would be fun to get a turkey a year ahead of time and feed it and so on for the following Thanksgiving. But by the time Thanksgiving came around, we sort of thought of the turkey as a pet, so we ate the dog. Only kidding. It was the cat!
dog spring confused
The weather here is gorgeous. It's mild and feels like it's in the eighties. The hot dog vendors got confused because of the weather and thought it was spring, so they accidentally changed the hot dog water in their carts.
funny dog numbers
Number one way life would be different if dogs ran the world: All motorists must drive with head out window.
funny dog screw-ups
They have dog food for constipated dogs. If your dog is constipated, why screw up a good thing? Stay indoors and let 'em bloat!
baseball dog love-is
You know what I love best about baseball? The pine tar, the resin, the grass, the dirt - and that's just in the hot-dogs.
dog water funeral
One of the dogs in the competition, a Portuguese Water Dog, is related to President Obama's dog, Bo. But they only see each other at funerals and weddings.
comedian horrible one-thing
All comedians are preoccupied with one thing and with one thing only-themmm-selllves. It's a horrible lot in life.
jerk disappointing admire
It's disappointing when you finally get to meet someone you admire and he conducts himself as a jerk.
prison be-good shipwreck
I'm very resourceful. I'd be good in prison. I'd be good in a shipwreck. I'd make a great hostage.
dark night drunk
Night clubs scare me. They're dark and they stink and they're dangerous and everybody's drunk.
talking air feelings
About half an hour before air time - that's when I become hyper. I put everything else out of my mind and just let that nervous energy surge through my body. I start talking faster and louder. My confidence comes up. It's actually a great feeling.
jobs fun beer
I knew that if I woke up hung over, I couldn't do the best possible job on the show, so I had to quit. Also, I'd consumed a lot of beer for a lot of years, and I thought, That's enough. I've had my fun and I'm glad I quit.