Dave Attell
Dave Attell
Dave Attellis an American stand-up comedian, writer and actor, best known as the host of Comedy Central's Insomniac with Dave Attell and The Gong Show with Dave Attell. Born in Queens, New York, he grew up in Rockville Centre, New York with his cousins the Small family and now lives in New York City...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth18 January 1965
CityQueens, NY
CountryUnited States of America
Dave Attell quotes about
stars thinking
I don't think I'm a star or a celebrity or any thing like that.
running thinking hepatitis-c
I love Fear Factor, but I think they're running out of fears. It's only a matter of time before they're sitting around doing shots of Hepatitis C.
sex funny-relationship thinking
Sex and murder are the same. Well, you say the same after both don't you? 'Damn I got to get the hell out of here! What was I thinking!'
jobs thinking comedy
My day jobs... I knew I was bad at those, so I didn't really have the confidence to think that I could do comedy. But I knew I hated the day jobs.
thinking drunk behind-you
Here's a tip: never get drunk while wearing a hooded sweatshirt. You will eventually think there's someone right behind you.
thinking winning ifs
I masturbate! I do it like I think if I keep doing it, I'm gonna win something.
moving thinking differences
Friends are important, dontcha think? Hmmm? I think so. The way I see it, you got friends, and you got your best friend, big difference. To me, a friend's a guy who will help you move. A best friend's a guy who will help you move a body. That's how I look at it.
fun thinking good-times
You ever make fun of someone so much, you think you should thank them for all the good times you've had?
kids thinking want
A lot of these kids I think are more content just to be on Facebook and the computer than they are to actually go out. They just really want to get a picture to post to their buddies, and that's about it.
growing-up dad thinking
Remember when you're young and you think your dad is Superman? And then you grow up and realized he's just a drunk who wears a cape.
chicken combine eat
What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish, ... You know what you should do? Combine them ... eat a penguin.
I like writing a joke, and I like when a joke works, and I like other comics who tell jokes.
people
Doesn't matter what you say or do; people can always find a way to call you a dick.
tvs
I like doing stand-up and I love putting out TV specials.