Anthony Jeselnik
Anthony Jeselnik
Anthony Jeselnikis an American comedian, television host, writer, producer, actor and podcast personality. He is known for his dark comedy style, which emphasizes misdirection, non sequiturs, biting insults, an arrogant demeanour, and a stage persona that frequently takes amoral stances...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth22 December 1978
CityPittsburgh, PA
CountryUnited States of America
kids want my-own
I don't ever want to have kids of my own. But I do want a lot of kids.
girlfriend men want
My girlfriend wants an open relationship. I said no way. What kind of man would I be if I had to tell my friends I date you?
girl crazy sleep
I prefer to sleep with deaf girls. Those crazy chicks never have a safe word.
dark talking people
I've always been fascinated by dark subjects, especially people's reactions to them. Why are people so uncomfortable talking about death if everyone dies?
dad boys knowing
My dad was amazing. He raised five boys. All by himself. Without the rest of us knowing.
girl band way
The best way to break up with a girl is like I'm taking off a band-aid. Slowly and in the shower.
suicidal kids long
I've got a long history of suicid in my family; the good news is it skips a generation, so, if I'm lucky, my kids will kill themselves.
girl fire type
I don't have a type, really. But I've always been more attracted to girls who yell fire.
body looks form
I have a rare form of body dysmorphia in which I absolutely can't stand how good I look.
girlfriend hate night
I like to play pranks on my girlfriend, you know, keep things fresh for me, make me laugh, you know? She hates it. But like, the other night, I put Saran wrap over the toilet seat, you know, which doesn't sound that original, but she's bulimic.
childhood obesity childhood-obesity
Childhood obesity affects all pedophiles.
funny mom couple
My mom, for most of her life, was a Holocaust denier. And it was terrible for the entire family to have to deal with until, finally, a couple years ago, we had an intervention. And we had a rabbi come into the home, had him walk her through the history of the Jewish people, and then he made her watch "Schindler's List." And after that, my mom did a complete 180. Now she can't believe it only happened once.
funny baby pain
You don't know anything about pain until you've seen your own baby drowned in a tub... and you definitely don't know anything about how to wash a baby.
funny dad father
My dad was a complicated man. He was a huge racist, my dad, but he still tried to be a good father, you know? Like, he would tell me that Santa Claus was black - that way, when I found out he didn't exist, it wouldn't be that big a let down.