Quotes about funny
funny humorous acting
Acting is a masochistic form of exhibitionism. It is not quite the occupation of an adult. Laurence Olivier
funny witty laughter
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three. Laurence J. Peter
funny wisdom children
Television has changed the American child from an irresistable force to an immovable object. Laurence J. Peter
funny-things play worry
That's the funny thing about life. We're rarely aware of the bullets we dodge. The just-misses. The almost-never-happeneds. We spend so much time worrying about how the future is going to play out and not nearly enough time admiring the precious perfection of the present. Lauren Miller
funny life world
I live in my own little world. But its ok, they know me here. Lauren Myracle
funny sadness waffles
You should eat a waffle! You can't be sad if you eat a waffle! Lauren Myracle
funny baby kids
You learn a lot though when you have kids, I'll tell you what. Did you know when a baby poops its diapers, you're not supposed to hit him with a rolled-up newspaper? Larry the Cable Guy
funny boys looks
Bought a pair of boots the other day, and they was some silicone gel in there. Big red letters said, "Do not eat." Do they really need that stuff in them boots? Is there really some dude opening a pair of boots goin', "Boy, look at them boots. What the hell? I better eat that. I don't know what the hell that is." Larry the Cable Guy
funny science technology
Obviously I was either onto something, or on something. Larry Wall
funny children mercy
As I get older, all sorts of things become less funny. Once one has children, any cruelty involving children becomes far less amusing than when one was at the mercy of one's friends' and relatives' children. P. J. O'Rourke
funny humor epcot
If Disney still wants to make Epcot Center futuristic, they could do so by blowing the place up with an atom bomb. P. J. O'Rourke
funny humor chinese
Visiting Future World is like opening a Chinese fortune cookie to read, "Soon you'll be finished with dinner." P. J. O'Rourke
funny couple humor
Walt is dead. And, after a couple of hours at Epcot, you'll wish you were, too. P. J. O'Rourke
funny humor epcot
At Epcot Center the Disney corporation has focused its attention on two things greatly in need of Disneyfication: the tedious future and the annoying whole wide world. P. J. O'Rourke
funny life sarcastic
Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them. P. J. O'Rourke
funny food wine
A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine, something brussel sprouts never do. P. J. O'Rourke
funny humor fake
If I like it, I say it's mine. If I don't I say it's a fake. Pablo Picasso
funny witty technology
Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. Pablo Picasso
funny-inspirational funny-motivational top-management
You're at your best when you don't know what you're doing. Paul Stanley
funny humorous air
I'm always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can't understand is, if they don't know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is? Paul Merton
funny justice brain
I have a brain and a uterus, and I use both. Patricia Schroeder
funny sarcastic witty
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception. Oscar Wilde
funny beautiful jealousy
Plain women are always jealous of their husbands. Beautiful women never are. They are always so occupied with being jealous of other women's husbands. Oscar Wilde
funny sarcastic eye
He is really not so ugly after all, provided, of course, that one shuts one's eyes, and does not look at him. Oscar Wilde
funny anniversary sweet
Most modern calendars mar the sweet simplicity of our lives by reminding us that each day that passes is the anniversary of some perfectly uninteresting event. Oscar Wilde
funny life break-up
The only way a woman can ever reform a man is by boring him so completely that he loses all possible interest in life. Oscar Wilde
funny country hunting
The English country gentleman galloping after the fox – the unspeakable in full pursuit of the uneatable. Oscar Wilde
funny truth gossip
It is perfectly monstrous,' he said, at last, 'the way people go about nowadays saying things against one behind one's back that are absolutely and entirely true. Oscar Wilde
funny music people
I like Wagner's music better than anybody's. It is so loud that one can talk the whole time without other people hearing what one says. Oscar Wilde
funny sarcastic dream
The basis of action is lack of imagination. It is the last resource of those who know not how to dream. Oscar Wilde
funny sarcastic money
It is only by not paying one's bills that one can hope to live in the memory of the commercial classes. Oscar Wilde
funny marriage sarcastic
How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. Oscar Wilde
funny beauty beautiful
No object is so beautiful that, under certain conditions, it will not look ugly. Oscar Wilde