Famous Quotes & Sayings

Chris Rock

Comedy is the blues for people who can’t sing.

Chris Rock

Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know?

Chris Rock

If you're black, you got to look at America a little bit different. You got to look at America like the uncle who paid for you to go to college, but who molested you.

Chris Rock

If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near fourty.

Chris Rock

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

Chris Rock

Don't argue! You cannot win, you cannot beat a woman in a arguement. It's impossble you will not win. Cause men, we are handicapped when it comes to arguing cause we have a need to make sense

Chris Rock

I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.

Chris Rock

If you can keep your son off the pipe and your daughter off the pole, you're ahead of the game.

Chris Rock

A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House.

Chris Rock

I used to work at McDonald's making minimum wage. You know what that means when someone pays you minimum wage? You know what your boos was trying to say? "Hey if I could pay you less, I would, but it's against the law.

Chris Rock

Only dumb people try to impress smart people. Smart people just do what they do.

Chris Rock

Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.

Chris Messina

I like funny things, but I don't find myself particularly funny.

Germaine Greer

No sex is better than bad sex.

Gertrude Stein

It is funny the two things most men are proudest of is the thing that any man can do and doing does in the same way, that is being drunk and being the father of their son.

Gertrude Stein

I know what Germans are. They are a funny people. They are always choosing someone to lead them in a direction which they do not want to go.

Gertrude Stein

Don't write about what you don't know even if you don't know it.

Mordecai Wyatt Johnson

Acquiring a dog may be the only opportunity a human ever has to choose a relative.

Morey Amsterdam

A Cannibal is a person who walks into a restaurant and orders a waiter.

Morey Amsterdam

My neighbor has two dogs. One of them says to the other, "Woof!" The other replies, "Moo!" The dog is perplexed. "Moo? Why did you say 'Moo'?" The other dog says, "I'm trying to learn a foreign language."

Mordecai Richler

Edmonton is not the end of the world but you can certainly see it from there.

Miles Davis

I would never try and play like Harry James, because I don't like his tone - for me. It's just white. You know what I mean? He has what we black trumpet players call a white sound. But it's for white music ... I can tell a white trumpet player, just listening to a record. There'll be something he'll do that'll let me know that he's white.

Miles Davis

You can't eat a winner's plaque.

Milan Kundera

The best actors do not let the wheels show.

Mike Leigh

Resolve was never stronger than in the morning, after the night, when it was never weaker

Jacob Bronowski

Every animal leaves traces of what it was; man alone leaves traces of what he created.

George Foreman

I've seen George Foreman shadow boxing and the shadow won.

George Armstrong Custer

There are not enough Indians in the world to defeat the Seventh Cavalry.

Albert Einstein

The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax

Gary Mills

All year, we've been a perimeter-oriented team. Perimeter-oriented doesn't work up here. We got some good looks. It's funny how they don't drop. I think we're better shooters than that, but we didn't show it.

Billy Gillispie

All of a sudden, it wasn't so funny.

Dean Young

All of a sudden, big wealthy playboys weren't funny anymore.

The goal has been not to get pigeonholed. I like working in different genres. I'm gonna try to be entertaining and funny and do my usual thing.