Famous Quotes & Sayings

Robin Williams

I went to rehab for alcoholism in wine country, just to keep my options open.

Robin Williams

We were talking briefly about cocaine... yeah. Anything that makes you paranoid and impotent, give me more of that!

Robin Williams

When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family knew someone in the Royal family?

Robin Williams

Gentiles are people who eat mayonnaise for no reason.

Robin Williams

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White House.

Robin Williams

I'm sorry, if you were right, I'd agree with you.

Robin Williams

Look at airport security now. What started out as definite racial profiling is now where the computer picks a name. That's why you get a seven-month-old getting a pat down. [Imitates a security officer.] "Check the diapers. They're full."

Robin Williams

And some people say Jesus wasn't Jewish. Of COURSE he was Jewish! 30 years old, single, lives with his parents, come on! He works in his father's business, his mom thought he was God's gift, he's Jewish! Give it up!

Robin Williams

Reality: What a concept!

Robin Williams

I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic region covered with ice.

Robin Williams

I like my wine like my women - ready to pass out.

Robin Williams

Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.

Robin Williams

You could talk about same-sex marriage, but people who have been married (say) 'It's the same sex all the time.'

Robin Williams

Cocaine is God's way of telling you you are making too much money.

Tracey Ullman

I think serial monogamy says it all.

Tracey Ullman

It's funny - if you impersonate somebody, they have no idea it's them.

Tracey Ullman

As I get older, I just prefer to knit.

Tori Spelling

It would be pretty funny to see a Beverly Hills white girl with mad rap skills.

Veronica Roth

Can you be a girl for a few seconds?" "I'm always a girl" I frown. "You know what I mean. Like a silly, annoying girl" I twirl my hair around my finger. "Kay.

Robert Graves

The remarkable thing about Shakespeare is that he really is very good, in spite of all the people who say he is very good.

Robert Green Ingersoll

The Church has always been willing to swap off treasures in heaven for cash down.

Rudyard Kipling

I've just read that I am dead. Don't forget to delete me from your list of subscribers.

Samuel Johnson

I hate mankind, for I think myself one of the best of them, and I know how bad I am.

Samuel Johnson

Almost every man wastes part of his life attempting to display qualities which he does not possess.

Samuel Johnson

Fly-fishing may be a very pleasant amusement; but angling or float fishing I can only compare to a stick and a string, with a worm at one end and a fool at the other.

Samuel Johnson

No man will be a sailor who has contrivance enough to get himself into a jail; for being in a ship is being in a jail, with the chance of being drowned... a man in a jail has more room, better food, and commonly better company.

Roy Bean

I find this corpse guilty of carrying a concealed weapon and I fine it $40.

Rowan Atkinson

I'm as poor as a church mouse, that's just had an enormous tax bill on the very day his wife ran off with another mouse, taking all the cheese.

Rowan Atkinson

Look, if I'd wanted a lecture on the rights of man, I'd have gone to bed with Martin Luther.

Rowan Atkinson

I find his films about as funny as getting an arrow through the neck and discovering there's a gas bill tied to it.

Rowan Atkinson

Your services might be as useful as a barbershop on the steps of a guillotine.

Rowan Atkinson

You're about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.

Ronald Reagan

But I also happen to be someone who believes in tithing--the giving of a tenth .