Related Quotes
funny humorous mind
I have made up my mind that I must have money, Pa. I feel that I can't beg it, borrow it, or steal it; and so I have resolved that I must marry it. Charles Dickens
funny morning self
All knives and forks were working away at a rate that was quite alarming; very few words were spoken; and everybody seemed to eat his utmost, in self defence, as if a famine were expected to set in before breakfast-time to-morrow morning, and it had become high time to assert the first law of nature. Charles Dickens
funny death witty
He would make a lovely corpse. Charles Dickens
funny kings humorous
It is an old prerogative of kings to govern everything but their passions. Charles Dickens
funny people literature
Although a skillful flatterer is a most delightful companion if you have him all to yourself, his taste becomes very doubtful when he takes to complimenting other people. Charles Dickens
funny christmas xmas
Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childhood days, recall to the old man the pleasures of his youth, and transport the traveler back to his own fireside and quiet home! Charles Dickens
funny law people
If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers. Charles Dickens
funny marriage wedding
Marriage is a feast where the grace is sometimes better than the dinner. Charles Caleb Colton
funny age fifty
I'm aiming by the time I'm fifty to stop being an adolescent. Charles Caleb Colton
witty profound sublime
Shakespeare, Butler and Bacon have rendered it extremely difficult for all who come after them to be sublime, witty or profound. Charles Caleb Colton
witty expression order
Euphonic and harmonious expressions, forcible and just expressions, profound and comprehensive expressions, and especially apt and witty expressions, each have their specific influence upon different minds, and their common influence upon all minds.... It is therefore high time our most valuable aphorisms and paragraphs were put in order for frequent perusal, and for handy reference, as the circumstances of life call up subjects. Charles Simmons
witty memories kids
A long memory is the most subversive idea in America. A tautology is a thing which is tautological. A witty saying proves nothing, but saying something pointless gets people's attention. If your kids look like you, it's hereditory. If they look like the neighbor, it's the environment. Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. Dave Barry
witty stupid party
What I think is that the F-word is basically just a convenient nasty-sounding word that we tend to use when we would really like to come up with a terrific-ally witty insult, the kind Winston Churchill always came up with when enormous women asked him stupid questions at parties. Dave Barry
witty time compelling-reason
You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time. Dave Barry
witty technology promise
I will vote for the first candidate who promises to use nuclear missiles against LinkedIn. Dave Barry
witty powerful reality
Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be attracted to refrigerators. Dave Barry
witty sex teenage
It's very witty and it's great to see teenage characters have control that way. And you can actually hear about sex and pot and it's okay, it's not completely bad and you can't say that to teenagers. Caroline Dhavernas
witty tongue wit
Your wits make others witty. Catherine the Great
time son boys
A boy's story is the best that is ever told. Charles Dickens
time fool calendars
Tomorrow! It is a period nowhere to be found in all the registers of time, unless, perchance, in the fool's calendar. Charles Caleb Colton
time all-things
Time is the measurer of all things, but is itself immeasurable, and the grand discloser of all things, but is itself undisclosed. Charles Caleb Colton
time retreat tides
Time ... advances like the slowest tide, but retreats like the swiftest torrent. Charles Caleb Colton
time two black
Time,- that black and narrow isthmus between two eternities. Charles Caleb Colton
time looks one-thing
To look back to antiquity is one thing, to go back to it is another. Charles Caleb Colton
time world overcoming
Time is the most subtle yet the most insatiable of depredators, and by appearing to take nothing is permitted to take all; nor can it be satisfied until it has stolen the world from us, and us from the world. It constantly flies, yet overcomes all things by flight; and although it is the present ally, it will be the future conqueror of death. Charles Caleb Colton
time journey men
Much may be done in those little shreds and patches of time which every day produces, and which most men throw away. Charles Caleb Colton
time opportunity enemy
Time, the cradle of hope.... Wisdom walks before it, opportunity with it, and repentance behind it: he that has made it his friend will have little to fear from his enemies, but he that has made it his enemy will have little to hope from his friends. Charles Caleb Colton