Famous Quotes & Sayings

Dave Barry

My wife, like many women, actually LIKES wrapping things. If she gives you a gift that requires batteries, she wraps the batteries separately, which to me is very close to being a symptom of mental illness.

Bryan White

Christmas makes me happy no matter what time of year it comes around.

Arlo Guthrie

What's in that pipe that he's smoking?

Andy Borowitz

Christmas never would have caught on if it had been called Celebrate a Little Jew's Birthday.

Andy Borowitz

Christmas sweaters are only acceptable as a cry for help.

Conan O'Brien

There are 17 more shopping days until Christmas. So, guys, that means 16 more days till we start shopping, right?

Publilius Syrus

Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present.

Jimmy Roy

We have a small, tight family. I left home at a young age and the best thing for me was to go home at Christmas-time and spend time with my family and friends. It's kind of funny, most people do turkey and all the trimmings, but we would have a big seafood festival because it's the only time of the year that we'd eat it. We never really went caroling, but once in a while we'd got out for a sleigh ride

Louis C. K.

One thing I learned from drinking is that if you ever go Christmas caroling, you should go with a group of people. And also go in mid-December.

Alexandra Guarnaschelli

The hardest thing about being a full time chef is leaving my work behind when I go home at night. I'll toss and turn about a menu item or forget to order produce and wake up at 4 A.M. in a cold sweat over some artichokes.

Alexandra Paul

I know I'm an actor, but I'm not at all a believer in people watching a lot of TV. I've never had television in my home.

Alexandra Adornetto

(Beth) "I don't care anymore." I turned my face up toward Heaven. "That's not my home anymore. You are.

Italo Calvino

I feel so at home in New York that I don't have the urge to write about it.

Dave Gahan

Like every New Yorker, I have a love/hate relationship with the city. There are times it's overbearing, but when I'm away even for a little while, I can't wait to get home. I am a New Yorker.

Andy Landers

Let's be honest. It will be very much like a home game.

Benjamin Franklin

Let thy maidservant be faithful, strong, and homely

Joseph Gallagher

Lumber is up by about 25 percent over two weeks ago and carpeting and all the things that go into a home are up and spiked.

Greg McBride

Make sure you're in your home long enough to recoup those costs.

Chris Evans

If you want to be around in 10 years you've got to do something to differentiate yourself from the pack.

Charles Spurgeon

If we had to preach to thousands year after year, and never rescued but one soul, that one soul would be a full reward for all our labour, for a soul is of countless price.

Charles Spurgeon

In all of my years of service to my Lord, I have discovered a truth that has never failed and has never been compromised. That truth is that it is beyond the realm of possibilities that one has the ability to out-give God. Even if I give the whole of my worth to Him, He will find a way to give back to me much more than I gave.

Charles Spurgeon

Ten minutes praying is better than a year's murmuring.

Dick Van Dyke

All of us involved say 'The Dick Van Dyke Show' was the best five years of our lives. We were like otters at play.

Dick Van Dyke

I wanted to be Stan Laurel, then I wanted to be Fred Astaire and then Captain Kangaroo. I actually started out as a radio announcer when I was 17 and never left the business, so that's literally 70 years.

Dennis Wolfberg

After ten years in therapy, my psychologist told me something very touching, he said, “no hablo ingles.”

Dennis Ritchie

Unix has retarded OS research by 10 years and linux has retarded it by 20.

Dennis Prager

Some of us worry about a resurgent Islam and its attendant complications for a decayed Western civilization; some of us worry about global warming. In twenty years' time, one of us will be proved right . . .