Famous Quotes & Sayings

Carol Leifer

I've seen too many comics who got their own shows and were undone because they worked for an executive producer who didn't understand their comedy or their sensibility.

Andy Bader

We were trying to make a movie that was funny, but also trying to be smart about being funny. We just wanted to make people laugh,. If you want to make a comedy you just don't want to hit people in the groin for two hours, even though that's really funny too. We wanted our jokes to have a little weight to them.

Texas Battle

To all my soap fans out there, my horror fanatics, comedy lovers, I will tell you this: 'Death Valley' is an action-packed drama, comedic, horror TV series that has a non-stop adventure in each episode. It's like a huge pot of Texas gumbo. If you like all four of those genres, then you'll love this show.

Don Ohlmeyer

Veronica's Closet' will do a 27 share on a Thursday night and it's dismissed. And (Comedy Central's) 'South Park' does a two share and it's on the cover of 'Newsweek' magazine.

Don Adams

Sometimes I wonder how I got into comedy at all

David Suchet

Deep inside, I am desperate to do comedy.

Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa

American comedies about Asians have never been funny to me. That always kind of pissed me off.

Katherine Parkinson

You do develop a taste as an actress: Chekhov, Ayckbourn: it's the combination of comedy and human drama. I would never want to do anything without comedy.

Bruce Campbell

I see parody as another form of comedy.

Carol Leifer

I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.

Carol Leifer

It was a mixed marriage. I'm human, and he was a Klingon.

Carl Friedrich Gauss

Ask her to wait a moment I am almost done.

Agnes Repplier

Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding.

Agnes Repplier

Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.

Abba Eban

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.

Alan King

Banks have a new image. Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?

Alan Kay

Most software today is very much like an Egyptian pyramid with millions of bricks piled on top of each other, with no structural integrity, but just done by brute force and thousands of slaves.

Charlie Chaplin

All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.

Darrent Williams

With this injury and the things I have to do at my position, my groin can't have (problems), because I'm turning and running, turning my hips all the time. I can't really go out there at 50 percent.

Ozzie Guillen

Last year we put a lot of pressure on the opposing team because Pod was running. I think his groin is healthy and when he's healthy, we will run.

Travis Fisher

They say this is a different area, but it's still the groin to me. You never know, I could have been just out there running and tweaked it.

A. Hodge

He punched me in the groin and the ref saw it, A lot of times when I go on the road, I feel like the most hated man in the ACC, but you've got to play through that.

Brian Boucher

This is my first groin injury so I don't know how it's going to respond (to treatment). I'm very disappointed that I'm injured, but it is what it is. You have to move on.

Brian Boucher

This is my first groin injury, so I don't know how it's going to respond (to treatment),

Tom Izzo

You can't even punch a guy in the groin anymore.

Stephen Ryan

We have had 6,000 hits in the first 24 hours,

Victor Lazarovici

The real impact of what we've seen in the first quarter will hit the second-quarter results, from the increasing momentum of the metal price.

Josh Smith

When I've had to score, if they leave me open, I'm going to try to make them pay by hitting the jump shot like I did tonight.

Larry Wall

When Ivan hit last year, it passed over 150 platforms.

Craig Barlow

When it was in the air, I never thought of it going in. I just knew I'd hit it good.

Tom Seaver

Basically, hitters fall into a pattern, and once you know what they like, you can set them up for the putout with something else.

Sugar Ray Leonard

The time to stop is when the other guy hits you more than you hit him.

Kelly Hawthorne

We know if we pass it out they can hit the shots.

Jim Tracy

We know he's very capable. He has the pitches to get major-league hitters out.

Ricky Gervais

I can't find someone funny whom I don't like. Hitler told great jokes. I didn't find it funny at all.

David Cross

I just often find myself getting shrill, angry and the jokes get more incredulous.

Cesar Romero

A joke a day keeps the gloom away!

Bill Griffith

I always thought of Levittown as a joke.

Billie Joe Armstrong

I thought everybody was in on the joke. But I was the joke.

Matt McKenna

She jokes around with you and listens to your ideas.

Brad Williams

Everyone just wants to hear the exact jokes that apply to them and want to - everyone wants a perfectly crafted joke for them.

Issa Rae

I personally don't feel any pressure to make jokes about multiple baby-fathers and stereotypical black jokes, because one, that's just not my life, and two, I wouldn't even sound right talking about those things.

Ben Falcone

I'm not much of a joke writer.

Carre Otis

Eating disorders, body dysmorphia and a general dissatisfaction with one's life and body seems to ail too many young people.

Carol Roth

Most people end up owning a business by accident. Therefore, they don't usually have a thought process and a strategic plan in place.

Carol Kane

I don't feel that I have any great grasp of technique that I should pass along to people.

Carol Kane

That's when the great stuff happens, when you're not checking yourself all the time, being critical of yourself and what other people are doing.

Carol Leifer

They're all sources of material. What I love about what I do, the more you talk about your life, there are so many people who have similar experiences.

Carol Shields

I'm concerned about the unknowability of other people.

Carol Moseley Braun

All I really want to be is boring. When people talk about me, I'd like them to say, Carol's basically a short Bill Bradley. Or, Carol's kind of like Al Gore in a skirt.

Carol Moseley Braun

My parents were always philosophizing about how to bring about change. To me, people who didn't try to make the world a better place were strange.

Carlos Beltran

I don't want to be hiding from people. It would be difficult to be recognized everywhere, so that I couldn't do things ordinary people do.

Carlos Delgado

You've got to be smart to stay in this game. The quicker you learn, the quicker you succeed. You can't make the same mistakes over and over again.

Aaron Sorkin

Stupid people surround themselves with smart people. Smart people surround themselves with smart people who disagree with them.

Aaron Sorkin

Tell me what you think and then tell me what the really smart person in the room who disagrees with you thinks.

Alan King

My father was a dreamer - my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady's handbags, an old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: 'Don't end up like me.'

Charlie Cox

We had no idea that this show [Daredevil] would be as popular as it was, but with the benefit of hindsight, one thing I can say is that I think that was a really, really smart move.

Charles Stross

Humans are just barely intelligent tool users; Darwinian evolutionary selection stopped when language and tool use converged, leaving the average hairy meme carrier sadly deficient in smarts.

Charles Stross

Life begets intelligence, intelligence begets smart matter and a singularity.

Isaac Bruce

When it was there, he took it. When it wasn't that was pretty much the end of it. It is just being a smart player.

Ricky Gervais

If you're surrounded by idiots, you're the unpopular one and the odd one out because idiots don't like smart asses.

C. S. Lewis

Your Majesty would have a perfect right to strike off his head," said Peridan. "Such an assault as he made puts him on a level with assassins." "It is very true," said Edmund. "But even a traitor may mend. I have known one that did." And he looked very thoughtful.

Bram Stoker

How good and thoughtful he is; the world seems full of good men--even if there are monsters in it.

David Quammen

Whether you like the label 'Anthropocene' or not, whether you find the prospect of what it signifies inevitable or appalling (or both), the time has come to address its implications, as these thoughtful, battle-tested authors attempt to do. The time has long since come.

Cesare Pavese

Death is repose, but the thought of death disturbs all repose.

Eric Maskin

Through meteorology, we know essentially how hurricanes form, even though we can't say where the next storm will arise.

Daniel Day-Lewis

Well, we all have murderous thoughts throughout the day, if not the week.

Louis MacNeice

I do not envy any animal, though I envy many of their capacities.

Chinua Achebe

When we hear a house has fallen do we ask if the ceiling fell with it?

Chinua Achebe

Writers don't give prescriptions. They give headaches!

Carl Crawford

I'm going to try to not put a lot of pressure on myself.

Lee Daniels

When you're traveling, you can take it with you. You can use it for walking and I've done that many times actually trying to find restaurants.

Aaron Sorkin

Trying to guess what the (mass) audience wants and then trying to satisfy that is usually a bad recipe for getting something good.

Andre Walker

We were trying to play an up-tempo game, but then we started to play their style. That is how they usually play and they were more comfortable than we were.

Brian Schmidt

We were trying to get the word out, but they were stranded.

Alan Titchmarsh

Once I was on a plane and a woman said to me, 'Now, what's the matter with my tomatoes?' And I said, 'Well, it's a bit difficult to see from here.' She took offence and said, 'I was only trying to be friendly.'

Charlotte Bronte

Jane! will you hear reason?' (he stooped and approached his lips to my ear) 'because, if you won't, I'll try violence.

Charlotte Bronte

Better to try all things and find all empty, than to try nothing and leave your life a blank.

Charlie Haden

The whole underlying theme for the new music... is to communicate honest, human values, and in doing that to try to improve the quality of life.

Khloe Kardashian

Once you start losing weight and seeing results, you're like, 'I want to see more!'

Chiwetel Ejiofor

I'm constantly looking to see whether I look the same as I did earlier, whether I've put on or lost any weight.

Jordin Sparks

The weight really started falling off, and I could see my muscles. It was awesome.

Cathy Guisewite

This is a business meal. The calories do not count. I am mentally labeling these as 'business calories' so my body will know they were eaten in the line of duty and will process them differently.

Cathy Guisewite

Wake me up when I'm a size 5.

Cass McCombs

Opinions only carry weight in the second or third person.

Cat Deeley

I don't feel any pressure to lose weight - and in any case, if I didn't have my food I'd be a nasty piece of work and wouldn't be able to function.

Carre Otis

My weight fluctuated when I was 30, and I did the unthinkable - I stepped out as a plus-sized model.

Chanel Iman

I drink a lot of protein shakes and do a lot of weight lifting.