Jay London
Jay London
Jay Londonis an American stand-up comic, whose one-liner jokes made him a favorite on NBC's Last Comic Standing. Although he did not win either of the two seasons in which he appeared, his humble personality and clean comedy made him a favorite among the show's fans...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
CountryUnited States of America
dated
I dated a partially nude model, and she did a half-assed job.
asked bed blanket breakfast morning pig slept
I slept with this girl, in the morning I asked her if she wanted breakfast in bed? She said one pig in the blanket was enough.
american-comedian army-and-navy
I wanted to join the Army the sign said 'Be All That You Can Be', they told me it wasn't enough.
Does anybody know what I'm doing up here?
american-comedian
My boss told me to get my butt in gear. I told him I was shiftless.
asks bath bed beyond section work
I work at Bed Bath and Beyond. I work in the Beyond section. When someone asks me where is the Bath section I say 'It's Beyond Me'.
Virgo, and a real Virgo. Nit picky, cranky, cantankerous, fidgety, neurotic. All of the above, but that's good.
balls lonely watch
I had a very lonely New Year's this year, I had to watch my own balls drop.
american-comedian closed saw someplace
I saw a sign it said left lane closed so I went someplace else.
record store
I went to a record store and asked for 50 cent. They kicked me out for pan-handling.
american-comedian
My girlfriend has crabs, I bought her fishnet stockings.
american-comedian amish country
At Motel 6 in Amish Country I wonder if they leave the light on for you?
american-comedian
Do you know it was a year a ago today?
military training roaches
I'm convinced my cockroaches have military training, I set off a roach bomb - they diffused it.