George Carlin
George Carlin
George Denis Patrick Carlinwas an American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic and author. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and his thoughts on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. Carlin and his "Seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. v. Pacifica Foundation, in which a 5–4 decision affirmed the government's power to regulate indecent material on the public airwaves...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth12 May 1937
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
I say if you're going to go for the Angel bullshit you might as well go for the Zombie package as well.
Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.
I've never seen a homeless guy with a bottle of Gatorade.
A crumb is a great thing: If you break a crumb in half, you don't get two half-crumbs, you get two crumbs. Doesn't that violate some law of physics?
When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts. It will not be with jack-boots. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. Germany lost the Second World War. Fascism won it. Believe me, my friend.
Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backward.
Some people think of the glass as half full. Some people think of the glass as half empty. I think of the glass as too big.
The status quo sucks.
And, of course, the funniest food of all, kumquats.
My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me.
When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
When someone is impatient and says, 'I haven't got all day,' I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?
I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed.
I think we’re part of a greater wisdom that we will ever understand; a higher order, call it what you want. Know what I call it? The Big Electron. It doesn’t punish, it doesn’t reward, it doesn’t judge at all. It just is.