Elayne Boosler
Elayne Boosler
Elayne Boosleris an American comedian and advocate for animal rescue...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth18 August 1952
CountryUnited States of America
basketball years games
I pray if I ever find out I have only about three minutes to live it's during a basketball game, because then I'll have, what, 10, 12 years to live?
mother said
My mother always said you could eat off her floor; you could eat of my floor too, there's so much food down there.
animal two laughing
Most people love animals, and most people love to laugh. Combining the two makes both resonate deeper.
fashion dog philosophy
My fashion philosophy is, if you're not covered in dog hair, your life is empty.
keys silence comedy
To listen to your own silence is the key to comedy.
morning guy bagels
Guys wake up at your place and they expect breakfast. They don't eat bagels and M&M's in the morning. They want things like toast. I say, 'I don't have these recipes.'
citizens vote equal
Citizens are all equal in politics: we each have one vote.
shopping black-friday groceries
When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping.
funny military fighting
We have women in the military, but they don't put us in the front lines. They don't know if we can fight, if we can kill. I think we can. All the general has to do is walk over to the women and say, 'You see the enemy over there? They say you look fat in those uniforms.'
men solitude want
I know what men want. Men want to be really, really close to someone who will leave them alone.
baby funny-inspirational giving
People are giving birth underwater now. They say it's less traumatic for the baby because it's under water. But it's certainly more traumatic for the other people in the pool.
rip grandma heart
I think when you take off that jacket and they see that ‘I LOVE GRANDMA’ T-shirt, they’re going to rip your heart out.
real justice needs
Real comedy can't be learned; it comes from a need for justice. The best who stand up, stand up for something.