Daniel Tosh
Daniel Tosh
Daniel Dwight Tosh is an American comedian, television host, actor, writer, and executive producer. He is known for his deliberately offensive and controversial style of black comedy, as the host of the Comedy Central television show Tosh.0 and as the star of stand-up comedy tours and specials...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth29 May 1975
CityBoppard, Germany
CountryUnited States of America
girl eye blue
I will shut down Instagram so girls can't use filters into tricking us that they are that pretty; you're eyes aren't that blue, and you don't glow.
letters immigration silent
Spelling is difficult because there are too many rules. Silent letters only exist to make it harder for illegal immigrants to learn English.
party names tea
Even the klan revamped their image by losing the hoods and changing their name to the Tea Party.
love-you heart butterfly
When you're in young love your pulse pounds, your palms sweat, and there are butterflies in your stomach. It's like diarrhea for your heart.
good-friend foundation comedy
e foundation to a good friendship is trust but the foundation to good comedy is by betraying your friends.
fire doe hell
I don't know what fire is made of - hell nobody does. All I know is that fire is awesome. I'm not a pyromaniac, but I am a pyroenthusiast.
spiritual religious
I'm not religious, but I'm spiritual.
racism racist funny-jokes
I'm not a racist or misogynist person, but I find these jokes funny, so I say them.
gun security-guards made
If security guards aren't allowed to carry guns, I don't have to obey their made up rules.
world globes
I'll throw a globe at you! You ever been hit by the world?!
gynecologists mouths dentist
A gynecologist is the dentist for the downstairs mouth.
hops backwards
Kangoroos can't hop backwards.
tonight lines apologizing
If I offend anybody tonight, I apologize. That's not my intention. I'm not going to guess what your personal line of decency is; I cross my own from time to time - it's how I know I still have one.
canada would-be states
If Canada were really that great, it would be a state.