Craig Brown

Craig Brown
Craig Edward Moncrieff Brownis an English critic and satirist, best known for his parodies in Private Eye...
NationalityEnglish
ProfessionCritic
Date of Birth23 May 1957
along belong introduce leaves left motion player rule run school stay stops tee thus
Personally, I belong to the speedy school of golf. If it were left up to me, I would introduce a new rule that said every golf ball has to stay in motion from the moment it leaves the tee to the moment it plops into the hole, thus obliging each player to run along after his ball and give it another whack before it stops rolling.
board gain high letters player scrabble shut slam upset
Everyone must know by now that the aim of Scrabble is to gain the moral high ground, the loser being the first player to slam the board shut and upset all the letters over the floor.
affect forgotten guys indictment players playing quite resilient suspect
Players are resilient guys and tomorrow, quite frankly, I suspect it'll all be forgotten - after all, they're not playing for Sven, they are playing for England. So to say it could affect their performance, that's an indictment of the players.
beautiful hate perhaps players sinister supporters
How I hate the Beautiful Game! I hate its cry-baby players and its gruff, joyless managers, its blokish supporters and its sinister owners, its whistle-peeping referees and its chippy little linesmen, its excitable commentators and - perhaps most of all - its unpluggable 'analysts.'
came extra five games girls last motivated next six together year
(The season) was up and down but we really came together in the last five or six games and the girls are extra motivated for next year now,
life longer others people prefer
Some people see life as a game of chess, while others prefer to see it as a game of cricket; but the longer I live, the more I think of it as a game of Consequences.
legs michael
Michael Owen - he's got the legs of a salmon.
badly hit men playing tend trying
Like many men who play tennis, when I hit a ball into the net, I tend to look daggers at my racket, reproaching it for playing so badly when I myself have been trying so hard.
art highly men outsource prefer recovery skilled
Like many men, I am highly skilled in the art of losing things but prefer to outsource the recovery process.
bowler persist pinch wearing
Like the periwig and the bowler bat, the plus-four and the bow-tie, the blazer is on the way out, and those who persist in wearing it do so with a smattering of self-consciousness, a touch of obstinacy, even a pinch of camp.
blessed completing definitely focused good opening press project ready weather
We'll definitely be ready by then. It's been a full-court press to get ready. We've been blessed by some very good weather and everybody, from the very beginning, has been singularly focused on completing the project by opening day.
aged felt oldies school slightly sure though town
When I was a boy, I used to stay with a school friend in Bexhill, in Sussex, which was then well-known for being the town with more oldies than any other. Aged ten, I felt slightly embarrassed by this, though I'm not sure why.
above exist introduce lived reminding streets
What would we do without plaques to tell us who lived where and when? They introduce the past into the present, and are the quickest and most interesting way of reminding us that our streets exist above and beyond the here-and-now.
joys serve
One of the many joys of tongue-twisters is that they serve no purpose beyond fun.