Adam Carolla
Adam Carolla
Adam Carollais an American comedian, radio personality, television host, actor, podcaster and director. He hosts The Adam Carolla Show, a talk show distributed as a podcast which set the record as the "most downloaded podcast" as judged by Guinness World Records in 2011...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionTV Show Host
Date of Birth27 May 1964
CityLos Angeles, CA
CountryUnited States of America
funny kings sex
When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
funny humor home
You're 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don't have to kill yourself, you're just waiting.
funny growing-up humor
When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it's about fudge packing and triple D's at 13.
thinking leaving way
Everyone in Hollywood thinks like a Republican fiscally by leaving town to shoot everything; they just don't vote that way.
comedian politician
I'm a comedian, not a politician.
men certain
There are certain things women are better at than men.
thinking joy what-if
If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they'd be off TV. They're not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we'd know who she was?
feelings trying fine
I guess my feeling is that if you’re going to make a joke, that’s fine, but you should also sort of stand behind it, you know? A joke should be more than a joke, it should be a point that you’re trying to make.
want tvs middle
All TV is, is really: 'Don't you want to be this, aren't you glad you're not that.' There's nothing really in the middle.
soccer coffee thinking
I don't like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it's the biggest whatever in the World, look, they drink tea everywhere too; they're pussies, you understand? I want some coffee.
inspirational basketball ymca
Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
nice dirty naughty
In my early 20s I was so miserable doing construction, I wanted something that paid money. I liked nice stuff. I liked cars and architecture, and things that cost money. I wanted to not swing a hammer, and make money... and not do stuff that was dirty. I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn't very good at it.
mean should-have people
When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.
passion office vigor
Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.