Famous Quotes & Sayings

Charles Dickens

I have made up my mind that I must have money, Pa. I feel that I can't beg it, borrow it, or steal it; and so I have resolved that I must marry it.

Charles Dickens

All knives and forks were working away at a rate that was quite alarming; very few words were spoken; and everybody seemed to eat his utmost, in self defence, as if a famine were expected to set in before breakfast-time to-morrow morning, and it had become high time to assert the first law of nature.

Charles Dickens

He would make a lovely corpse.

Charles Dickens

It is an old prerogative of kings to govern everything but their passions.

Charles Dickens

Although a skillful flatterer is a most delightful companion if you have him all to yourself, his taste becomes very doubtful when he takes to complimenting other people.

Charles Dickens

Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childhood days, recall to the old man the pleasures of his youth, and transport the traveler back to his own fireside and quiet home!

Charles Dickens

If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers.

Charles Caleb Colton

Marriage is a feast where the grace is sometimes better than the dinner.

Charles Caleb Colton

I'm aiming by the time I'm fifty to stop being an adolescent.

Charles Caleb Colton

Expect not praise without envy until you are dead.

Charles Dickens

There are many pleasant fictions of the law in constant operation, but there is not one so pleasant or practically humorous as that which supposes every man to be of equal value in its impartial eye, and the benefits of all laws to be equally attainable by all men, without the smallest reference to the furniture of their pockets.

Charles Simmons

Good Humor is the best shield against the darts of satirical raillery

Alan Watts

The reason we want to go on and on is because we live in an impoverished present.

Alan Moore

Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense.

David Sedaris

Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.

Dave Barry

England manufactures most of the world's airline food, as well as all the food you ever ate in your junior-high-school cafeteria.

Dave Barry

English history consists largely of royal people getting their heads chopped off...Needless to say, this brand of history was a hit with our son.

Dave Barry

The basic Roman ruin design is a pile of rocks with a little plaque saying "Roman Ruins" and a group of tourists frowning at it and wishing they were back at the hotel bar..

David Cross

I just often find myself getting shrill, angry and the jokes get more incredulous.

Cesar Romero

A joke a day keeps the gloom away!

Issa Rae

I personally don't feel any pressure to make jokes about multiple baby-fathers and stereotypical black jokes, because one, that's just not my life, and two, I wouldn't even sound right talking about those things.

Ricky Gervais

I can't find someone funny whom I don't like. Hitler told great jokes. I didn't find it funny at all.

Billie Joe Armstrong

I thought everybody was in on the joke. But I was the joke.

Matt McKenna

She jokes around with you and listens to your ideas.

David Walton

Everyone can write jokes and makes things clever.

Frank Caliendo

I was very stale at Fox. Much of it was my own fault. I was lazy and didn't fight for things I wanted to do at other times. Most of my stuff consisted of setup/punchline jokes to the camera - a very old-school approach. I was part of the establishment, I guess.

Adam Brody

My best jokes are so cheap. All I do is say things sarcastically.

Charles Caleb Colton

It is astonishing how much more anxious people are to lengthen life than to improve it; and as misers often lose large sums of money in attempting to make more, so do hypochondriacs squander large sums of time in search of nostrums by which they vainly hope they may get more time to squander.

Charles Dickens

A multitude of people and yet solitude.

Charles Dickens

My faith in the people governing is, on the whole, infinitesimal; my faith in the people governed is, on the whole, illimitable.

Charles Dickens

Others had been a little wild, which was not to be wondered at, and not very blamable; but, he had made a lamentation and uproar which it was dangerous for the people to hear, as there is always contagion in weakness and selfishness.

Charles Dickens

Mrs. Boffin and me, ma'am, are plain people, and we don't want to pretend to anything, nor yet to go round and round at anything because there's always a straight way to everything.

Charles Dickens

Cleanliness is next to Godliness, and some people do the same by their religion.

Charles Dickens

I have heard it said that as we keep our birthdays when we are alive, so the ghosts of dead people, who are not easy in their graves, keep the day they died upon.

Charles Dickens

Some people are nobody's enemies but their own

Charles Soule

Superman/Wonder Woman, people expected, I guess, a lot of romance, or maybe something that wasnt emotionally deep. Who knows?

Kenny Graham

We started pulling some of the starters even though it was only 2-0 but you have to look at the big picture.

Vince Carter

When you think something can't be done, that's when he pulls off another stunt.

Bill Maher

New polls show that Obama is now pulling away from Mitt Romney. And, of course, what could be more natural than to see Mitt Romney and pull away?

Greg Williams

When we get real rain I'll have to get a tractor and pull them out of the mud.

Wayne Morgan

We're going to have to pull up our bootstraps.

Nick Rodriguez

We're doing better than I was hoping. I didn't think we'd be able to pull off a win until sometime around March.

John W. Thompson

We know what they're going through. We sympathize with them. We're still Southerners and we're still pulling together. It's all sweet tea and casseroles.

John Thompson

We know what they're going through. We sympathize with them, ... We're still Southerners and we're still pulling together. It's all sweet tea and casseroles.

Sherri Shepherd

Sometimes my husband has to literally pull me away from the computer.

Lance Gross

If I had my way, the woman I marry, she wouldn't be a part of Twitter and she wouldn't be on Facebook.

Tom Colicchio

I don't have a Facebook page and I don't think I will but Twitter for me is a way to take control of the message. Kind of wrestle it back. It's something I'm enjoying.

Banks

I've never really been into social media - I don't have a Facebook; I don't do Twitter or Instagram or anything.

John Knapp

Twitter is the samizdat of the 21st Century.

Andrew Luck

I don't know how old my phone is, but it was only $10. It is a nice subconscious way of not having the Internet at your fingertips... e-mail, Twitter or Facebook.