Steven Wright
Steven Wright
Steven Alexander Wrightis an American comedian, actor, writer, and an Oscar-winning film producer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical, and sometimes nonsensical jokes, paraprosdokians, non sequiturs, anti-humor, and one-liners with contrived situations...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth6 December 1955
CountryUnited States of America
reality comedy observing
To me, comedy is just twisting reality. It's commenting or observing or twisting life.
funny real humor
When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask if I'm leaving.
funny real humor
Why is it lemon juice contains mostly artificial ingredients but dishwashing liquid contains real lemons?
funny wall real
Doing a little work around the house. I put fake brick wallpaper over a real brick wall, just so I'd be the only one who knew. People come over and I'm gonna say, "Go ahead, touch it... it feels real."
running real home
Winny and I lived in a house that ran on static electricity. If you wanted to run the blender, you had to rub balloons on your head. If you wanted to cook, you had to pull off a sweater real quick
real might holograms
Real life? Well, I just hope mine isn't investigated. They might find that I don't really exist - that I'm just a hologram.
funny real humor
I saw a man with a wooden leg and a real foot.
american-comedian ask babies baby friend later noises
My friend has a baby. I'm writing down all the noises the baby makes so later I can ask him what he meant.
french ordered sign toast
I was at this restaurant. The sign said "Breakfast Anytime." So I ordered French Toast in the Renaissance.
bought microwave
I bought an occassional table........sometimes it's a microwave oven.
harder run supposed system
We have run the hydro system harder than it was supposed to be run this year.
bond effect factor line modelling per petrol remains rise suggest yields
Our modelling suggest bond yields should rise in line with the US by at least 1 per cent. The X factor remains any flow-on effect from petrol prices.
american-comedian bothers deep grow
Sponges grow in the ocean. This bothers me. How deep would it be if they didn't?
happens
It happens so fast, and I've been doing it so long that it's unconscious,