Stephen Colbert
Stephen Colbert
Stephen Tyrone Colbert is an American comedian, writer, producer, actor, media critic, and television host. He currently hosts the late-night television talk show The Late Show with Stephen Colbert on CBS...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionTV Show Host
Date of Birth13 May 1964
CountryUnited States of America
real mean names
The most common thing that real reporters say to me is, "I wish I could say what you say." What I don't understand is, why can't they say what I say, even in their own way? Does that mean they want to be able to name certain bald contradictions or hypocrisies that politicians have?
sarcastic native-american wonderful
I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving. Or, as it's known to Native Americans - Sarcastic You're Welcomesgiving.
promise news i-promise
Anyone can read the news to you. I promise to feel the news... at you.
obamacare people needs
Obamacare needs the premiums of healthier people to cover the costs of sicker people. It's a devious con that can only be described as insurance.
mean doctors eight
Obamacare takes effect in less than eight months. Do you realize what this means? If you go to the emergency room now, you'll be covered by the time you finally see a doctor.
waiting care lines
Now you'll have to wait for hours in line for medical care instead of immediately not getting any.
television soup news
Gravitas is the soup bone in the stew of television news.
religion atheism worship
Atheism: the religion devoted to the worship of one's own smug sense of superiority.
know-how knows
There must be a God, because I don't know how things work.
jobs stupid fighting
Senator Kerry does not support our troops. If he had won the election, there wouldn't be any troops left in Iraq. President Bush, on the other hand, has given our troops an opportunity to fight without end. That's creating jobs. In fact, the president's policies helped create 104 more job openings last month. Now who's stupid, Senator?
italian issues cain
Cain understands domestic issues because he had experience selling pizza; and he understands international issues because pizza is Italian.
horse dark black
Will Herman Cain become the first black President that I acknowledge? I call him a dark horse because he's an unlikely candidate who surged forward, and not because he's a horse.
character boxing feelings
I'm a satirist, so I've got boxing gloves on if the person is worthy of satire. But I'm not an assassin. If that ever happens, it's only because something happened during the interview that got me going, and then I had to translate my feelings to the mouth of the character.
texas race competition
Texas governor Rick Perry has been in the race only three days, and he's already blowing away the competition like it is a trespassing coyote.