John Bradshaw
John Bradshaw
people abuse survived
Most people who have survived abuse have great strength.
mean feelings needs
To be shame-bound means that whenever you feel any feeling, need or drive, you immediately feel ashamed. The dynamic core of your human life is grounded in your feelings, needs and drives. When these are bound by shame, you are shamed to the core.
hurt loneliness intimate-relationships
The drivenness in any addiction is about the ruptured self, the belief that one is flawed as a person. The content of the addiction, whether it is alcoholism or work, is an attempt at an intimate relationship. The workaholic with her work or the alcoholic with his booze are having a love affair. Each alters mood to avoid the feeling of loneliness and hurt in the underbelly of shame.
spiritual growth form
True love heals and affects spiritual growth. If we do not grow because of someone else’s love, it’s generally because it is a counterfeit form of love.
mistake guilt done
Guilt says I've done something wrong; ... shame says there is something wrong with me. Guilt says I've made a mistake; ... shame says I am a mistake. Guilt says what did was not good; ... shame says I am no good.
self knowing-who-you-are opinion
Hell, in my opinion, is never finding your true self and never living your own life or knowing who you are.
soulmate pain recovery
Recovery begins with embracing our pain and taking the risk to share it with others. We do this by joining a group and talking about our pain.
spiritual journey benefits
The spiritual quest is not some added benefit to our life, something you embark on if you have the time and inclination. We are spiritual beings on an earthly journey. Our spirituality makes up our beingness.
truth pain lying
It's essential to tell the truth at all times. This will reduce life's pain. Lying distorts reality. All forms of distorted thinking must be corrected.
honesty reality discipline
To truly be committed to a life of honesty, love and discipline, we must be willing to commit ourselves to reality.
heal feels
We cannot heal what we cannot feel.
dog responsibility suffering
The capacity for love that makes dogs such rewarding companions has a flip-side: They find it difficult to cope without us. Since we humans programmed this vulnerability, it's our responsibility to ensure that our dogs do not suffer as a result.
pain sadness healing
Our sadness is an energy we discharge in order to heal. …Sadness is painful. We try to avoid it. Actually discharging sadness releases the energy involved in our emotional pain. To hold it in is to freeze the pain within us. The therapeutic slogan is that grieving is the ‘healing feeling.’
relationship children reality
Children are natural Zen masters; their world is brand new in each and every moment.