Jerry Seinfeld
Jerry Seinfeld
Jerome Allen "Jerry" Seinfeld is an American comedian, actor, director, writer, and producer...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth29 April 1954
CityBrooklyn, NY
CountryUnited States of America
humor
Nobody enjoys the 'little show about nothing' humor more than me, but that is never the way I look at it.
funny music humorous
Somebody just gave me a shower radio. Thanks a lot. Do you really want music in the shower? I guess there's no better place to dance than a slick surface next to a glass door.
funny humor men
There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, 'I know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked.'
new-york humorous night
Everybody in New York City knows there's way more cars than parking spaces. You see cars driving in New York all hours of the night. Its like musical chairs except everybody sat down around 1964.
humorous phones wish
I wish I was a phone machine. I wish if I saw somebody on the street I didn't want to talk to I could just go, "Excuse me, I'm not here right now, If you just leave a message, I can walk away."
funny witty humorous
It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.
funny dog humorous
If aliens are watching us through telescopes, they're going to think the dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a poop, the other one's carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge?
education humor people
I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?
funny witty humorous
Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV.
article china clothing club equivalent expensive lost mall side since west
The article said that since the Upper West Side lost Charivari (an expensive clothing retailer) and the China Club (a nightspot), it's equivalent to 'a mall in Iowa,'
drop life mind suits
As a comedian, I found this thing, this profession, that suits my mind and life force. To drop it to do something else? I just don't get that.
commercial knows offers
The Internet offers opportunities that are more unique than ever before. With TV, I know I'm making 22 minutes; I know there's a commercial in the middle. With the Internet, no one knows anything. No rules.
advertising against best bowl compared directly number people super
I've done a number of Super Bowl ads. And that is the best advertising of the year. That is when people realize they're going to be compared directly against other ads.
actual comedian experience miss painful spend time virtual
You spend so much time in the world of virtual that the actual - which nothing is more actual than stand-up - it's a painful experience for the audience, and the comedian a lot of time - we miss that.